Tag: about me

When the flow of inspiration strikes

MiaLeave a comment
fingers holding a pencil
Made in Canva

Being a creative person has it’s good and bad sides. Bad is when you have no inspiration and no motivation. The best thing about it is when the flow of inspiration strikes. Those are the best days. Ideas come flooding in your head and you spend hours doing what you love. It can be writing or anything artistic. People who have these flows coming out only truly know how it feels. Other can probably imagine but they don’t really know how it is. You can’t just tell a person to create something in a minute. It takes longer than that. If you want things to be done properly you should have time to do it. Nothing good comes out of things when they are rushed. You can’t force out your creativity. Sometimes you have to wait for the flow and that’s something an ‘average’ person can’t handle.

Everyone is good at something and for me, writing is my passion. I don’t claim I’m the best because I’m not an author. I just write because I love it and I do it for fun. I especially love writing fiction. I have always had a good imagination. Writing stories was one of my favourite things in school. I always got good grades from the teachers. I got my inspirations from music, movies and daily things. It doesn’t really matter where. I can get an idea of anything. Even from strangers so people better beware because they can end up in one of my stories. OK, not really but almost. Fiction is made up and not a fact of real life. Even though sometimes when you think something won’t be real it actually does happen. I’ve been amazed by some of the characters I wrote about actually do exist in real life. It’s more about human behaviour than a real person. I’m no Agatha Christie so I don’t write crime stories like murder. Even though some of my characters do break the law.

Sometimes when I write a story I get writer’s block in the middle of a story but I get an idea what will happen after the unfinished chapter. That’s what has happened to ‘Teach me manners‘ It’s stuck now because I have written things what happens after the next episode. I can’t post it because the next one is incomplete. This is where the flow of inspiration ends. To create something I need the right moment to go on. If I don’t have the right feeling I struggle to get anything done. It’s not only about writing but it’s also photography. If I don’t have the right moment I don’t feel like doing it. That’s what I realised I can’t be a pro photographer. I don’t have the right passion. I also realised I wanted to do more than just photography. When I do get the flow going, I keep it running. Those are the best times. Having a break from one creativity thing and do the other is refreshing. It’s like taking a holiday and then come back with a lot of new ideas.

I go with the flow when I create something. It’s the same with this blog. I write when I have something to write about. That’s why I don’t want to be paid to blog. When you have it as a hobby there is no pressure to write. If you don’t feel like writing you don’t. You get to do other things and that is freedom to be creative when you feel it. In a way, the flow of inspiration is my hobby and when it strikes I’m glad I’m the creative one.

Coming up with an ingenuity

Mia3 Comments
light bulb on dark blackground
Made in Canva

Coming up with an ingenuity that no one has yet discovered is not an easy task. But if it was easy everyone would be a genius. Maybe someone would have found a cure to all the wrong things that happen in life. Sometimes things are what they are and you can really do anything about it. You just have to accept it and move on. There have been times when I thought I made the best ingenuity ever but they turned to shit. One of them was when I planned what my blog would be about. Not only on WordPress but also on Tumblr. The later is a bit of a disappointment. Their whole concept is boring these days anyway. And it’s not because they turned off all the explicit stuff. It’s actually a good thing. It means no more pornographic followers. Those annoyed me the most since my Tumblr’s was nothing about that. There are no decent posts to reblog either so I don’t use it as often as I used to. Besides, Tumblr had some weird stuff and I wouldn’t recommend it to any sane person. Well, I used it so what does that say about me. It does have decent things there too so it’s not all bad.

I’ve had so many bad ideas about occupations and educations so I doubt I get anything right. I’m still disappointed about some of the feedback I got from a school assignment at Helsinki Design School and the portfolio presentation. So I’m gonna complain about that again. I thought I could do graphic design but the education made me think maybe I don’t have what it takes. It made me feel like a loser who thinks too highly of themselves. I don’t exactly get hundreds of views or likes on work I’ve posted online. It feels like talking to a wall. I don’t have the ingenuity that you probably need if you want to work with design. Practice makes you better but my motivation is low so I don’t feel like it. I have this demon on my shoulder saying, then give up, but then the angel says, no don’t. The reason why I went to this education was to add a service to my possible web design business but it hasn’t gone as I thought. Not having enough confident of my skills it’s hard to imagine anyone wanting to hire me for their project. In design, it’s important to know people and I don’t know anyone.

I applied to employment training in digital marketing and e-commerce just to have a plan and because I’m interested in it. It’s a long way to that and I don’t even know if I get in the course. For now, that is some kind of ingenuity for the near future. Having many backup plans is never a bad thing. If it’s good or not will remain to be seen.

Which way to go and it can not be ephemeral

MiaLeave a comment
next step with chalk
Made in Canva. Photos from Pixabay.com

Here I am again, thinking about what to do next in life. It’s summer so I don’t really want to think about it. I applied for a job but I doubt I even get an interview. I just hate when people want to define you from your application and they only want what benefits them. Applying for jobs is just that. Trying to impress people who probably don’t even care. They expect you to dance to their tune. When I make a decision about what the next step might me, it’s usually ephemeral. I wish I could stick to something in the long run but I’m too indecisive. I didn’t expect my education in Helsinki Design School to open any new doors but I didn’t want it to stop everything again either. I feel I already studied everything I wanted and now I want to practice what I’ve learned. I don’t even know if I learned anything. It was the same with web design. I learned these things in school but when the real world came, I was totally lost about what to do. It’s not like I’m operating on people but still, it makes me nervous. Not even getting an unpaid internship doesn’t help the matter.

I’m never been good with decisions as I’ve written in this blog many times before. I have the attitude, I can do it tomorrow, but I never do. Then it’s suddenly been 2 years or so. People who are younger than you get the opportunity because you hesitated. Getting out of your comfort zone isn’t easy in practice. It’s easy for someone else to say it to you than actually doing it. There are thousands of tips online about how to make faster decisions but they’re no use to me. I can’t do it anyway. It’s easy to choose about what movie to see or what to eat, then making decisions what you want to do with your life. There are people who have studied in Helsinki Design School and they started their own business. During studying there. If not with their own business but other successes. I wish I could have been one of those people but I never got around doing it. But I couldn’t concentrate on two things at once. That’s one of the reasons I never worked during any education I’ve been in.

I’m not even sure I’m ready to be on my own but what can I do if I can’t find a job. I’m tired of doing nothing and not having any near future plans. It should be my decision to do what I feel and not waiting for acceptance from other people. There are many ways to do things and you don’t need to do everything anyone else does. I want to make a decision that isn’t ephemeral. I want to stick to decisions that are long-lived.