Everything on this blog is genuine. Everything I write belongs to me. I stand by every word I write. These are my opinions and I hope you all respect them. Most of the photos you see here are taken by me. Please don’t take them because that’s not really nice. If you want to use this material, please ask my permission first. Thank you!
A voyage of 9 years on Grammarly

I don’t belong to a book club. Never have. But I have been using Grammarly for 9 years. There’s a voyage of learning English. In Finland, we start to learn English in the 3rd or 4th grade. It depends on which school you go to or which year. It was in 1987 or 1988 when I learned English for the first time. I was at least 10 years old, so it’s a long time. I even got a diploma for my improved English. I’ve learned a lot since then.
In Finland, we have English-language subtitles for movies and TV shows, so we learn from them. English has almost become my 3rd language, besides Finnish and Swedish. I listen to English music and read English books. I don’t belong to a book club, but I do belong to a Grammarly club.
I’ve used the Pro version, but I had to cancel it for a while. But now I have it again. The Pro version gives so much more. It checks the spelling and grammar. It’s a good way to learn English. Grammarly is not only useful when writing this blog, but it also works on mobile (Android, iPhone, iPad), Windows, and Firefox. It’s really useful, and it has helped me a lot.
I didn’t realise I’d already been using Grammarly for 9 years. I could almost put it in my resume 🙂 I know more about English than I did 10 years ago. If I hadn’t learned English, this blog would not exist. Not other writing in English, for that matter. I only wish I could learn other languages as easily as this. Those lessons don’t stick in my head as well as English does. And I thought I was good at learning languages, but I guess it’s only English. So far, I’ve managed fine. My dad didn’t speak any language other than Finnish, so my mother and I were guides when we were abroad.
The voyage to another level of English continues.
Laughable things I’ve heard in my life

You probably heard the expression, ‘kids say the darnest things.’ But the reason they say laughable things is that they haven’t lived long enough to know things. They don’t see life as adults. You don’t get defended, you just think, well, they’re just kids, and you let it go.
But when adults say or do laughable things behind your back or to your face, it’s not as nice. You get offended and maybe cry, and at the time, it’s not laughable. You feel as if that hurt feeling won’t go away. You might think there is something wrong with you when people say or do offensive things to you.
What’s great about becoming an adult is when you begin to think about how laughable other people’s behaviour against you was. Life experiences change you, and you see life differently. Things that happened when you were a kid and a teenager are irrelevant when you become an adult. People who were in your life then, like schoolmates, are just laughable now. If they hurt your feelings, then you laugh at it now because the people were laughable. The next time, the words or actions bounce off you.
I’ve heard many laughable things during my 48-year-old life. They weren’t laughable then, but now they are when thinking about it. I won’t understand why people can’t keep things to themselves. They probably felt better about themselves if they said it or whispered it to their friends. Toxic people don’t have a place in my life. In anyone’s life.
The first one I remember was when I was probably in 3rd grade, and one of the boys in my class told me I had dirty teeth. That’s hurt me, so I didn’t go to class because of it. I was a sensitive and shy kid. So, I hadn’t brushed them, but so what? No need to point it out.
In 1997, I studied business for a few months. There was this guy in my class who asked me if I had been in a horror movie. I asked why, and he said no reason. So he didn’t like my appearance. It wasn’t like he was an oil painting. I didn’t care about his stupid comment anyway. I should have asked if he’s been in one, but I didn’t think about it then. It really was laughable. Strange that some people criticize someone’s appearance when themselve don’t look anything special. They should keep it to themselves.
One case that wasn’t anything personal, but it was quite laughable when I think about it now. I studied web design in 2017. We had on-the-learning period where we had to find clients to design websites. I got contacted by a possible client. But they said they wanted an more experienced designer. Now, that doesn’t make any sense. I was a student, and I did it for free. If you want an experienced designer, you need to pay for one. No professional does it for free.
The latest laughable thing was when I got a comment in a fan fiction that I’m writing. I don’t remember exactly how it was since I deleted it. Something like I’m wasting my life, and others are living their lives. And yadda, yadda. Who’s wasting their life for real? People who waste their time on commenting on fan fiction, that’s who. Perhaps they don’t like real person fiction or how the story goes. It doesn’t matter. I want to have real comments about the story, and not people complaining about other things. The comment wasn’t only a few lines. The person used a lot of energy on their comment, so they must have a lot of time on their hands. I won’t stop writing because someone says something negative. Writing fan fiction is my way of relaxing and learn writing in English. If everyone who writes stopped at negative feedback, no one would write anything, and the world would be a boring place.
Certain people have negative energy, and they don’t want anyone to try anything. You can’t do this, or you can’t do this. Nice attitude there. Luckily, people still do different things no matter what others say. You might not like what people do or how they look, but you should still have respect for others. There is too much negativity in the world anyway, so spread some positivity instead.
Going crazy with all these problems

With money, you have problems, but you also have trouble when you don’t have much. It’s crazy how much things cost, and when you don’t have any income, it’s even worse. You have to save money for important things like rent and bills. I’m going crazy with these problems. Soon the savings are gone, and what to do then?
It shouldn’t be like this for anyone. Some people got it worse than me. I’m not the crazy one; the world is. The uncertainty is the worst. Will things never get better? I shouldn’t have these problems at this age. Being unemployed isn’t a picnic. Some people think it’s easy to get a job, and those without one want to stay out of work. Most unemployed people want to earn their own money. You don’t live on welfare forever.
I would get money if I sold my flat, but I need money to hire a cleaner and moving help. But since I don’t have any income, I can’t afford it. My car doesn’t work, so I can’t fix it. Luckily, I don’t need the car right now. I still need to pay car taxes. It would be nice to have money to go on a cruise, go to an ice hockey game, and not worry about money in the first place. Not be worried that I don’t have money to pay bills.
I want to become an entrepreneur, but I’m afraid of starting because I haven’t found any clients. I’ve tried a lot of things, but no one’s buying. People only want free things. I need something right now and not in a few years. I’ve been on many paid courses about digital marketing, but none of those tips have worked. Perhaps it works for people who sell courses. I sell graphic design services. It feels as if I’m wasting time on trying to write a post that would attract clients. I don’t have the money to hire someone to do the marketing part. Now I have to do everything alone, so I don’t have time to design.
It’s a perpetual cycle. Problems come, but none are solved. All you can do is hope things will get better and try not to go crazy. People talk about how much money they have, but not many talk about the lack of it. It’s as if it’s taboo. If someone is saying they are working because they love the job, they’re not totally honest about it. You need money to survive; it’s a bonus if you love what you do.
I love designing and photography, but that doesn’t pay the bills. It would be nice to earn money from it, but without clients, it’s impossible. Right now, I need to hang on and not give up. That never makes me feel better, but I have to believe it somehow.
