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Day 26. What is your favourite part about yourself?- it sounds like a job interview question. I have a lot of good qualities, so I can’t just choose one. Everyone should be proud of who they are. It doesn’t matter if someone doesn’t appreciate them and tries to change you. Unless they are bad qualities, and even then, you are the one who should be open to making the changes.
What people seem to lack is being considerate. They only think about themselves and don’t see there are other people. They have no respect for rules either. They smoke in front of you, and they don’t even ask for permission. They talk loudly no matter what time it is. This is a problem in high-rise buildings. You would think they are hard of hearing. It’s the same with playing music out loud in the middle of the night. There are rules that you shouldn’t make loud noises after 10 pm. When you live in a building with other people, you should respect other people who live there. You can’t act the way you want to. It’s strange that adults don’t know how to be. Just to name of few reasons. I’ve been brought up to be considerate towards others. I can’t understand people who aren’t. Sometimes I wish I lived in a place where there were no other people around. If there were, they should be as considerate as me. People with good manners are always welcome.
I’m also compassionate. I can put myself in someone else’s shoes. Especially if I’ve experienced it personally. I could never hurt anyone of purpose. If I have, I feel bad afterwards. I will never understand why someone wants to hurt someone else. I know how it feels when no one seems to care about you. Bullying kids or adults isn’t right. There have always been different people, and we should respect that. It won’t change by bullying just because they’re different from you. People are afraid of things they don’t understand. Certain people try to be cool, but they only look like fools. The bullies are the ones with the problem. It’s a shame they don’t get the help they need. Having compassion is a quality more people should have. I’m glad I have it, and I don’t need to search for approval from other people. I had enough attention at home.
I’m relatively open-minded. Sometimes I do doubt about trying something new. I’m open-minded about different ways of living. It’s doesn’t matter what sexuality you are or what race you are. All that matters is that you know who you are and are happy in the things you do. As long as you respect others and don’t judge. I dislike it when people assume about things. You should research first before making up your mind. Things are not always the way they seem. I admit that sometimes I disapprove of certain things, but that’s only because I didn’t think they would happen for real. One of them is polyamory relationships. People who live with more than one partner. I just don’t get it. I thought that only happened in fiction. It’s a bit weird that’s a thing. The same with open relationships. So one wasn’t enough?! I wouldn’t say it’s disgusting, but it’s something I would never do. I can’t even find one. If I was looking, that is. People can live the way they want. Who am I to judge?!
One final good quality I have is that I know how to do many different things. I might not be good enough at it, but I’m versatile. I have studied many things. Most of them are creative. People might think I don’t know what I want. The truth is, I do, but I don’t know what I should focus on. I want to do so much, but I’m also indecisive, which is also a bad quality of mine. What I do best is writing. I used to want to do something that I could use that skills. I didn’t want to become an author like people thought when I said I wanted to write. I can hardly finish a fanfiction story, so how could I finish a book. I thought I wanted to become a journalist, but I wasn’t good at writing news or doing interviews. I have always written something. Diaries, stories in school etc. Writing as a hobby was good enough for me. I discovered blogging and real person fan fiction, and here I am. I love writing in English. When I try to write in Finnish or Swedish, I don’t get any ideas. Since English is an international language, it gets more readers. I was very good at it in school too.
Day 25. As Kelly Clarkson sings, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. I am much stronger than I was when I was a teenager. Life experiences make you stronger. If I hadn’t gone through the difficulties I have, I wouldn’t be as strong as I am today. No one’s life is perfect. You learn from your mistakes, and you grow as a person. What makes me feel strong is knowing that I have survived so far. I wouldn’t want to be the person I was. The people I’ve met in the past and the people close to me that have left this earth has made me the person I am today. People who hurt me didn’t leave me bitter. I should thank them for ignoring me and making me feel worthless. It wasn’t my fault. I was only the person I was, and I didn’t pretend like they did. I learned not to care what other people thought about me. They didn’t have any effect on the choices I have made. They couldn’t spoil my life if they thought that. They were only cowards who had low self-esteem. I learned from the experience that no one could treat me the way they did again.
Listening to music has always been a good escape from bad things. I usually don’t listen to the lyrics that carefully, but sometimes I find songs that make me feel stronger. It’s not only music that makes me feel like that, but also entertainment in general. It doesn’t matter if it’s TV or movies. I couldn’t live without them. It makes the time goes faster too.
I feel strong too when I write. In English, mostly. If it’s blogging or writing fiction, it makes me feel better. I’ve got better at it. That’s the only thing I feel confident in. It depends what I write, though. If it’s for a job search, then not so much. I’m more into making up stories and sharing my thoughts about something. Doing things you love makes you feel strong. Other times it wouldn’t be as fun.
Day 24. Sometimes I remember my dreams, but they disappear from the mind after a while. I usually dream about places I’ve been to and people I used to know. Before we buried my mother, she used to appear in them. After we did, they disappeared. But I still see her in my dreams. My dreams are also quite strange from time to time. They are in two parts. First, they’re in one place, and suddenly the scenes change. Sometimes they don’t make sense. I own a book about dreams and their meanings. Sometimes I look at it, but that’s only for fun. My dreams have no special meaning. Sometimes when I sleep, I don’t see any dreams. At least not what I remember.
Some people might hear talking in their dreams, but it’s only visual for me. Before I got a driver’s license, I used to have dreams where I drove a car, but I couldn’t find the breaks. The car went really fast. It was quite an awful dream. I don’t have premonition dreams, but this one came true. Last November, I drove on the highway. Suddenly, the gas pedal got stuck to the floor. My heart was beating fast, and it was so scary. Fortunately, there wasn’t any traffic. I carefully put on the break, and it slowed down. My dad was with me, so at least I wasn’t alone. The pedal got stuck in traffic once too. At least I didn’t crash into anyone. The mat on the floor had got under the gas pedal, which was why it got stuck.
I’m usually the spectator in my dreams, and no one sees me. It’s alright if it’s only an ordinary dream. But if it’s a dream about someone I like, I’m a little disappointed. But once, I had a dream where the person did see me, and we even spoke. It was about actor Tom Hiddleston.
I was in some public bathroom brushing my teeth with toothpaste, and he was there too. I said to him “I really hate toothpaste” (which I do in real life) He said something to me, but I don’t what. He was really nice to me.
It was a weird dream, but I was so happy he saw me. I wish I remembered what he said, though. That would have been even better. I have seen a dream about him later too, but it was from afar. Having a good dream after a night sleep makes you feel good the rest of the day. Having a bad dream makes you feel the opposite. Hopefully, I don’t see them very often. It would be nice if you could save your dreams somewhere, but that’s an impossible dream.