Swish and the time is gone

speed lines of a road
Made in Canva

It’s been a month since my last blog post. There are different reasons why I haven’t blogged in a while. Swish and the time is gone. I just haven’t had anything to write about. I haven’t been busy but I’ve had other things on my mind. And I sleep really late. I guess I have a lot of sleeping to catch up since I stopped my job. I have also watched a lot of movies on TV, so many late nights too.

So soon this year is over. I guess the top topics have been the coronavirus and US presidential elections. The other world news is all a blur to me. Personally, I had the job and then got laid off for a while. Then back to work. Now that is over. In private life, my dad had a falling accident about a month ago and then he went to a hip operation. Now he is in rehabilitation so I’ve been at my dad’s place. He’s probably coming back home this week. I’ve also been visiting him at the hospital. With a mask on, of course. So that’s about it.

Christmas is around the corner. It’s gonna be at home after some years of a break. Of course, it would be nice to go somewhere but, you know, the coronavirus is something not to be messed with. I for one don’t want it. Luckily I haven’t even got the cold which is great. I hope it won’t come either. I hate a stuffed nose and the sneezing. The coronavirus has gotten worse in Finland. One day there were over 400 who got it. There are still people who don’t wear a mask but they have their reasons. It’s not really comfortable but it wasn’t as bad as I thought. I don’t go anywhere anyway. Only to the store and visiting my dad at the hospital. I try to avoid people as much as I can. But I do that other times too anyway. I don’t actually mind this coronavirus. I don’t like touching things with bare hands and don’t care much about hugging either. I never got that handshake thing either. You can greet someone with just a ‘Hi’ and that’s it. The Japanese don’t use handshakes so why should I.

Only a swish and then the year is over. I don’t plan anything. I live in the present. I’ve thought about a few things what I could do. One of them is if I should get a driver’s license after all. My dad has always been the driver so I haven’t needed one. But now when he’s getting older and he can’t drive forever. I tried to get one when I was younger but I didn’t finish it. My mother was disappointed to spend all that money on it. But I realized I was too afraid to drive. Maybe I just wasn’t ready. What worries me is that I might not be ready this time either. I have gone without a license this long and I haven’t needed one. My mother never had one either. A lot of people don’t even want one. You can’t always get a ride where you want. When you go by public transport the problem is the schedules and other people. I don’t need a car because I can always borrow or rent one. My dad doesn’t want to drive long-distances anymore so maybe if I did have a license, we could drive somewhere the way we used to. The driving schools are much different than they were over 20 years ago or so. Sometimes I think I don’t really need a license but then there are days when I wish I had. Getting a job would probably be much easier too. At least there would be more options. If you feel too much pressure to drive on the street with others, then maybe having a driver’s license isn’t a good idea. Since I already been to driving school, driving would be easier to learn. I still remember how to start a car. The biggest problem would probably be the tests. I failed them so many times last time and you had to pay for them each time. That’s where the money went. I really have to think about what to do with this. Maybe that’s my goal in the summer of 2021. That and maybe find something to do for a living.

From a circle to a spiral

Made in Canva

So back to work on Monday won’t happen. Now it’s pushed back to August 2. Oh, well at least I don’t have to go anywhere. There is no summer holiday after all. Only ‘holiday’ as usual. How things change, from a circle to a spiral. The circle being the straightforward thing. While the spiral is not knowing where to go or do. Nothing new will happen. Things will be the same as they always been before I had this part-time job. I won’t get any job experience. A lot of people have needed to change things because of the coronavirus. At least I’m financially secured so I have no problems with that. Now I can concentrate on things I usually do. I don’t get paid for it though. Right now it’s good to live in Finland. The coronavirus here hasn’t been as powerful as in other countries. Even the restaurants and other places are being opened next week. I fear there will be more sick people after they open them. We can only hope this virus won’t be around forever.

I have always had trouble concentrating on one thing at the time. Even if I hear a sound elsewhere, I get distracted for a while. I also have different thoughts in my head. It feels like a spiral in my mind. I can have one thought and then it changes to something else. It’s like my brain has ADHD. I have a mild ADD (never officially tested) but I don’t know if that’s the only reason. Even when I write this blog I get distracted. I could write one thing and then the subject would change to something else. I do try to stay on the subject though. My mind is mostly more spiral than a circle. Maybe that’s one of the reasons why I have a vivid imagination. I have a knack of making up stories, a.k.a. fiction. Sometimes I get totally in the story and forget the time. Then other times I get nothing and I get no ideas. When I do, it’s back to the spiral mind. If I didn’t, I would get bored very quickly. Days just fly by even if the days are the same because I still get things done. It might look like I don’t do anything but my mind works all the time. If that was a job I would probably have more money than I do now. I never let myself get bored and it doesn’t matter if I am because a mind needs to be in a circle once in a while.