Tag: dailyprompt

Bucket without a list

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What makes you nervous?

Daily Prompt

A lot of people have bucket lists. Things to do before 30, 40 or 50. But I have a bucket without a list. I don’t like to plan ahead. It doesn’t matter if I don’t achieve something at some age. Certain things you can’t plan. You don’t need to do them until a certain age. I didn’t think I would ever go to a concert when I was a teenager, but now I have been to several. Two more this summer. I didn’t think I would get a driver’s license, either. Life is full of surprises. If you haven’t achieved something at 30, you can do it before 40 etc. So, what if you don’t achieve them at all. Bucket lists aren’t rules you must follow or something will happen to you if you don’t.

One thing that could be on a bucket list, but it won’t, is talking on the phone with strangers. It makes me nervous. I can never call an employer. If someone says I should call one, I get terrified. I had to call once and was so nervous; it took hours to pick up the courage. I hate that feeling and do anything I don’t need to call anyone. Writing an email is easier because the risk of screwing up is minimal. You should not force an introvert to make a phone call. It’s easier to talk to someone you know. It’s calling a stranger where the problem lies. I have blocked unknown numbers on my phone because I don’t want to talk to strangers.

I don’t think I ever get over the dislike for needles. Blood tests make me nervous. That’s one of the reasons why I can’t donate blood. I can’t get a tattoo, either. I wouldn’t want one anyway. Injections are OK because it’s over in moments. Unless you need to get them a lot, as I did once. In 1994 had endoscopic surgery for my knee. I had to wait a few days for it, so they gave me injections in my stomach. I don’t remember why. It was something about not getting blood clots because I had to stay in bed. The injections made me feel sick to my stomach. I didn’t want them at all. Needles cause me anxiety. Even if I use a needle to mend something, I’m always worried I’ll stick myself. Anything sharp makes me nervous.

Face your fear, but I don’t want to face a fear that makes me nervous. I prefer not to do things that make me feel like that. I never want to make speeches or presentations. I don’t like people looking at me. I want to get out of that situation as fast as possible when I’m nervous. I rush things, and it’s ruined. If it’s a presentation where I stand alone, I only get nervous when it’s my turn and not before. Things look easy in my head, but the reality isn’t. Avoiding unpleasant things is easier, and I don’t want to put them on a bucket list.

I can’t predict the future

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Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Daily Prompt

The way things are going now, I can’t predict the future. I don’t know what will happen this year, so I can’t know what I’ll do in 10 years. I won’t move a muscle until I figure out what I want to do right now. I can wish for things, but they are not future plans. I’ll be 56 in 10 years (I will turn 46 on June 2). Hopefully, I will have a job. At 56, it’s not easy to get hired. I wouldn’t want to be unemployed at that age. Maybe in 10 years, there won’t be age discrimination. A lot can happen in 10 years. You never know when you will die. I can get some deadly disease or get into an accident. My dad probably won’t be around in 10 years. He turned 79 this year. Unless he’s blessed with a long life like his half-sister. She’s 91 years old. My dad doesn’t exactly live a healthy life. Even if a person does live healthily, they can still pass on at any age. I could imagine what I could be in 10 years if I was younger. Now I can only wish.

I know I won’t have anybody in my life. There will only be people that will only be there for a moment, and then I will meet new ones. It sounds sad, but I have nobody now, either. Some people are better off alone. I like being on my own. I like meeting new people and all that, but I need my privacy. Now and in 10 years. Or who knows. I can’t predict the future.

I want to feel I have achieved something. I don’t want big things to happen, though. I live day by day. I don’t want to think about the future. I hope I can do what I feel. I can’t be forced to do something I’m not comfortable with. Other people can see what they want to see. I know myself, and I don’t change because someone doesn’t like the way I am. You shouldn’t live the way other people want you to live. It’s your life, and you can do what you want as long as it’s legal. Society must learn that we can’t all be the same and live the same way. I hope in 10 years, differences will be more accepted.

Repost: My look on introvert myths

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Source: https://evilnymphstuff.wordpress.com/2012/12/29/in-the-mind-of-an-introvert/

What’s something most people don’t understand?

Daily Prompt

Here’s myths about introverts that I found on the internet. There’s a lot of myths about introverts out there. But being an introvert shouldn’t be seen as a problem. It’s not like we’re from another planet. Some of the answers to the myths I disagree with. There’s a lot more but these are 10 of the best. This is how I see them.

Introverts don’t like to talk
In a way that’s not true. I only talk when I have something to say. I don’t waste my time on talking nonsense. But talking is not my favorite thing. I just don’t like the sound of my voice. If you give me a subject I really like, don’t even imagine, stopping me. Me, quiet, no, I just think before I speak. That way I won’t say something stupid and hurt someone’s feeling. Confrontation is the worse thing I know. Especially around strangers.

Introverts are shy
I can be shy when it comes to people I don’t know. I do wonder if I’m really introverted or just shy. Obviously they are two different things. It depends in what kind of mood I’m in. I’m also a coward so maybe I’m a cowardly, introverted shy person.

Introverts are rude
Anyone can be rude and it has nothing to do with being an introvert. I try to be nice to people, if they’re nice to me. If they’re not, they can see another thing coming.

Introverts don’t like people
Sometimes that’s true. I do like people but most of the time they’re annoying. I would rather talk to a pet (if I wasn’t afraid of them that is) or to a plant than to people. I just hate repeating myself. Maybe people have wax in their ears or I talk too fast so they don’t hear what I’m saying.

Introverts don’t like to go out in public
How am I suppose to buy food if I don’t go out in public? I’m not afraid of the outdoors. You have to go out sometime to get some fresh air. Seeing other people is good for the mental health as well. You don’t have to interact with them if you don’t want to.

Introverts always want to be alone
Maybe that’s the reason the reason I don’t have any friends. People think that I always want to be alone. I do but sometimes I wish there would be someone to talk to. Even one. I don’t need a lot of friends to keep me happy.

Introverts are weird
Weird are the people who think introverts are weird. Even extroverts can be weird. Being weird makes other people look too ordinary. What a boring place the world would be if no one was weird.

Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun
How can you relax when extroverts are trying to change your personality. And partying and drinking is not the only way to have fun. People just seem to have no imagination when it comes to ways to have fun.

Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts
Or the other way around. Introversion is not a decease, it’s a personality. Some might become more extrovert when they get older but still be introverts. I’ve tried to be extrovert but it just feels unnatural. It’s just not me. I don’t think extroverts are really honest with themselves. There lives an introvert in all of us. If everyone were extroverts there would be no solitude or silence anywhere.

Introvert prefer books to partying
Me, reading a book? Don’t make me laugh 😀 I’ve tried to read Lord of the rings twice but I failed miserably. I rather stay home and watch TV than read a book. Beside I’ve never even been invited to a party. If I did I would say no because the reason people party is the get drunk. At least in Finland. Besides I don’t like alcohol and drunk people. Once a homebody, always a homebody.

In the end we’re all the same. It doesn’t matter what star sign you are or what country you live in. Everybody should be proud of who they are. Why should we label people in the first place? It’s much easier to accept differences than trying to change a person.
I’m proud to be introverted because I know when to shut up 😉

Originally Published on JANUARY 10, 2015