My few concert experiences

concert
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I wanted to go to a concert when I was a teenager in the 1990s, but my mother didn’t let me. At the time, foreign bands didn’t come to Finland that often. You had to travel to Stockholm, Sweden. But sometimes, they did, which was great. The American boyband, New kids on the block, was the first band I wanted to see live in concert. Perhaps the tickets were expensive, so my mother didn’t want to pay for them. The same with the British boyband, Take That. They haven’t been here since then. I’ve only seen their concert on TV and once in a movie theatre. But it’s not the same. They’re still around, but they succeed more in their own country. I haven’t heard their songs on the radio anymore. But thanks to Spotify, I can listen to them.

I have never been into festivals. I think I have only been in one, but that was a free one. I have no memory of it, but I’m sure I have been into one. There are always some bands or artists I can’t stand at festivals. Concerts are more my kind of events. It took until 2017 that I got the courage to go to a concert. Before that, I didn’t like big crowds and didn’t have the money to go, either. The first concert was by Robbie Williams. That was the moment I got the going to concerts- bug. It was such a great experience. It’s the atmosphere and feeling of seeing your favourite artist in real life. You’re there with other people who have the same favourite as yours. The best part of a concert is when the audience sings along to the songs. The performer loves the feeling too.

This year, as you might know, I went to two other concerts. The one I really looked forward to seeing was Duran Duran. (FYI, today it’s Duran Duran Appreciation Day) You can read about the concert from the link to the band’s name in this paragraph, so I don’t need to repeat it. It was worth waiting for. Who knows if they will come back to Finland again. I can’t afford to travel aboard to see concerts, so they better get here instead.

I don’t usually do things without thinking, but when the American band Toto would come to my city, I didn’t think twice about it to go. I’m not that familiar with their music, but I know their hits. They’ve been around since 1977, with different line-ups since then. I listened to their other songs before I went to the concert. They composed most of the soundtrack to the original movie, Dune, in 1984, so they’ve also done songs without words. In the concert, there were awesome different instrument solos. I’ve always been fascinated by how some people can play instruments so well. I can hardly play easy songs.

In concerts, the volume is so loud, so sometimes you don’t hear what a band is playing or saying between songs. No wonder they have earplugs in their ears when they perform. Loud noises are not suitable for your hearing in the long run. I haven’t used earplugs. It’s a bit scary to put them inside my ears. My hearing is still great, anyway. The concerts should be heard as intended, loud and live. It’s only for a short period anyway. It can take years before I go to concerts again. If only that Elton John concert wouldn’t have been cancelled. It would have been next year. Oh, well that’s how it goes sometimes. You can’t always get what you want. Not even in concerts.

Narrowing down is the hardest thing

two yellow lines on asphalt
Photo: Andrew Martin Pixabay

When you’re a person who likes to do more than one thing in their life, narrowing them down is the hardest thing. Sometimes I wish I could narrow my interests, but I’m not that kind of person. I could have achieved so much more if I had only concentrated on a few things. It feels like time is running out, and I don’t have time to do anything. I need to have time to be lazy too. I thought I wanted to be one thing, but my interests got somewhere else. That’s how my life has been. So many choices but so little time. Maybe one of the reasons why I have had so many problems with decisions is that I think the grass is greener on the other side. Perhaps I’ve been too unrealistic with what I’ve wanted to do in my life. It isn’t a lack of support from other people. I subconsciously don’t dare to do things because I’m too scared of failing. Or maybe I’m just too lazy. It can also be like that because I failed many times, so I don’t want to go through it again. I know when you fall, you get up again, but still, I don’t get anything done.

I could have narrowed things down, but I like to be versatile. I never wanted to have an ordinary job, so it was difficult to know what to study. When I finally do, that’s not enough either. The reality is that some people are narrow-minded, even if they might think that they aren’t. Their opinion is that you need to have specific education and a certain amount of job experience to be good enough to be in their little group known as ‘their business’. You need to be a student or have an amount of experience to even get an internship. Neither way, you can’t gain experience if you’re not allowed to practice your skills in a job. I’ve started to believe I’m not meant to be a graphic designer. At Helsinki Design School, where I studied some years ago, I didn’t get the encouragement I expected. I got the assumption that I’m only average compared to the others. One time I got feedback on a poster I made about my city from one of the teachers. I should have done some research, and she wouldn’t have put it on her wall. I know my town, so there is no need for it. I just think she didn’t understand my style. One opinion doesn’t make me believe I’m bad at graphic design. Drawing isn’t my strong point anyway. It makes you think twice, though. It’s the same with photography. I doubt my skills in that too. Seeing other people’s work doesn’t help me either. It’s a little depressing. It makes me think I’m not good enough at anything. It feels like I’m an outcast and don’t belong to this creative business club. Maybe I have wasted my time and life thinking I have what it takes to be a graphic designer. Or any other job where design is concerned.

It’s a positive thing to have knowledge of many things instead of only having one narrow one. Both have a good and a bad side. If you know about many things, it’s also more challenging to choose between them. If you have a narrowed skill, it’s easier to improve that. Either way, both are needed. If there is something you can’t do, there is always someone who can. I only wish someone could have some use for my skills in the workplace, but I guess there isn’t. Too bad for them.

Bloganuary: What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger

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Day 25. As Kelly Clarkson sings, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. I am much stronger than I was when I was a teenager. Life experiences make you stronger. If I hadn’t gone through the difficulties I have, I wouldn’t be as strong as I am today. No one’s life is perfect. You learn from your mistakes, and you grow as a person. What makes me feel strong is knowing that I have survived so far. I wouldn’t want to be the person I was. The people I’ve met in the past and the people close to me that have left this earth has made me the person I am today. People who hurt me didn’t leave me bitter. I should thank them for ignoring me and making me feel worthless. It wasn’t my fault. I was only the person I was, and I didn’t pretend like they did. I learned not to care what other people thought about me. They didn’t have any effect on the choices I have made. They couldn’t spoil my life if they thought that. They were only cowards who had low self-esteem. I learned from the experience that no one could treat me the way they did again.

Listening to music has always been a good escape from bad things. I usually don’t listen to the lyrics that carefully, but sometimes I find songs that make me feel stronger. It’s not only music that makes me feel like that, but also entertainment in general. It doesn’t matter if it’s TV or movies. I couldn’t live without them. It makes the time goes faster too.

I feel strong too when I write. In English, mostly. If it’s blogging or writing fiction, it makes me feel better. I’ve got better at it. That’s the only thing I feel confident in. It depends what I write, though. If it’s for a job search, then not so much. I’m more into making up stories and sharing my thoughts about something. Doing things you love makes you feel strong. Other times it wouldn’t be as fun.