Your consult is an insult

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

I don’t know how many times I’ve been to these job search courses. They’ve been quite useless. *But at least I have something to do. Like I don’t have anything else in my jobless life*. Quite frankly, their consulting is insulting. You don’t get a job; they do. They give you advice on what to do to find a job, but that doesn’t work. You must be someone special to get attention. If you don’t have an impressive resume, you don’t even get a chance. I’ve also been to a career coaching course, but I found the web design education through that one. I haven’t had much use to that school, though. Real-life has been totally different. No one wants to hire someone who hasn’t got work experience. This whole “go to a job search and doors will open” is full of it. Sound bitter? I bet I am, but some people have been to courses like that, and all they did were playing some kids games. I have got at least something out of it. I know what kind of job I want to do.

I still haven’t got a job despite that. I just don’t have anything to offer. I don’t have any marketing value, or whatever you call it. I’m a ‘boring’ person. I don’t know how to brand myself. I also lack job experience. That’s probably one of the reasons. The second is job interviews. Trying to teach me to be better at it doesn’t work. They never go as I’ve planned it. I always forget what to say to the answers to the questions. No matter how I prepare, they just don’t work. In job search tips, people forget that you need to have something on your resume. You can’t just make it pretty if you have nothing to show for it. I also hate writing cover letters. I never know what to put in them. Finnish is also not my strongest language either. Then again, I don’t know what to write them in any language. Finding a job in a creative business is even harder. There you need to have some kind of skill. You also need a few years of experience. I’ve been to job fairs, but there is never any creative businesses there.

There are many different ways to search for a job. The most overrated platform there is, and that’s LinkedIn. I don’t know for who it’s meant for. ‘Look at me’ – types, ‘Look at my company’ -types or for who? It’s not for ordinary job seekers, that’s for sure. There are consults about how to get ‘noticed’ on LinkedIn too. Personally, I find it useless, and when I go there, I only want to give it the finger. I’ve decided I will only keep it for my own good—a reminder to myself what I have done so far. For job search, it’s only crap.

I just don’t fit anywhere. I can’t find a place where I have the same values, or I’m just too introverted. You have to be outgoing and this and that. I’m too old to get a job I have no education for. I wouldn’t get one of those anyway. I want a job I know something about. I know I’ve studied the “wrong” occupation, and I can blame myself for that (I’m not really). But I rather am unemployed than be in a job I hate. At least I can do what I want. Besides, of this covid still being around, I want to stay away from unnecessary social events. I have so many other things to think about, so I don’t have time to stress about my job search right now. I want to concentrate on driving school first.

*Sarcasm

Long shadows following me

selfie shadow
©Mia Salminen 2021

I just can’t catch a break, can I? It’s nothing bad or anything like that. It only feels long shadows are following me whatever I do. Especially when it comes to education and job search. They say you should study, but what is the point when you’re not giving a change in the working world. You need job experience, but then internships are not one of them. Maybe that’s the problem, I only have them and that one part-time job. I can never find any jobs to apply to because they need people with experience. I haven’t had the time to do any job search since my dad still needs certain help. I have tried to look at jobs ads, but I haven’t found anything to apply to. Writing cover letters is not my favourite thing. LinkedIn is a weird place to look for a job. I get quite silly suggested from job alerts too. Jobs that I don’t even have training for. I wouldn’t search for a job there anyway. I did apply for one, but it was a bit strange. I didn’t even know if it was real.

I wrote about this in this post. It’s about Helsinki Design School, where I studied both photography and graphic design. They asked former students about what they have done after school. So far, none of my schoolmates has come up in the student’s stories. Most of the stories so far has been about interior designers and visual designers. There have been some photographers and graphic designers too. They write about, e.g. networking and about the pros who teach there. Well, I haven’t had any of that. Especially in the photography course in 2014-2015. Maybe it has become better after I went there. It was new at the time. There were a few students who were disappointed. They didn’t get what they were looking for. I didn’t either, but I didn’t expect anything special. I’ve probably forgotten all about what was taught there by now. The same probably goes with the graphic design one in 2018-2019. Former students who have studied in school have found their strengths during their education, but I haven’t. I’m still looking. So in that way, I am disappointed at the education. But also I got something out of it. It doesn’t get me a job, but still, I didn’t want to study something for 4 years when I already had for 2. Graphic design is not science, after all. I am a bit envy of the former students who have had the courage to become entrepreneurs. If you have clients already, it’s much easier to start.

I think I want to be my own president because then I can be my own boss. I wish I was brave enough to start something on my own because I wish I didn’t have to stress about the job search. I’m not an actor so I can’t be something the employers expect me to be. This month is ending soon but the year is long, so we’ll see what will happen.

Connection lost at first sight

connection lost
Made in Canva

Ever felt that no matter what you do, you don’t find the connection with something or someone? You think you do all the right things but they still don’t work. You think it’s because of you. You might take it personally even if it isn’t. Some things don’t have an explanation. They just are. I feel or have felt like I’ve lost connection at first sight. When I meet new people I might talk to them but there is no other connection than friendliness. They say you should make connections so in the future you might need their help. But I have never met such people. They don’t even ask to keep in touch. Maybe I’m just not interesting enough. I don’t want to force people to keep in touch with me if they don’t want to. Making connections in job search seems to be important too. But since I never get any, I haven’t found anything. LinkedIn is a joke too. What a bunch of lies that is. No employer search for employees there. At least not in Finland. Here having relatives is very important or be very lucky.

I don’t get many connections on social media either. I really hate making up tags. Especially on Instagram. That spoils everything. It’s full of fake photos anyway. No one wants to be different. I don’t know why I even bothered starting to using it again. Sometimes I don’t even get any likes at all. It doesn’t matter how many tags I use or what kind of photos I have, they will never get more than 1 or 2. More if I’m lucky but never over 12. Using social media for job search are all lies too. You must be really an attention seeker or something special to rock someone’s world. It doesn’t boost your morale, it takes it out of you. I don’t how some get many likes. Are these people following them so they see the post or what? I just don’t get it. Never compare your followers to how many others have because it only brings you down. It’s all shallow about how to get people to notice/follow you. You should do this and you should do that. It takes forever and in the end, it’s all a waste of time. I just don’t want to bother with it anymore. I’m not gonna force out the tags. I just put what comes to mind and leave it at that. I get likes or I don’t, I’m only gonna post for my own entertainment. I’m tired of trying to impress people.

If someone wants to make a connection, it’s probably spam. You don’t see the difference between the truth and the lies because you haven’t had any real connections. Bad experiences make you doubt things. Especially when it comes to the Internet. You shouldn’t even believe what you see in there anyway. That’s one of the reasons why I don’t trust these platforms like LinkedIn in a job search because you never know if the connection might be an imposter. I rather use something else than use it. It only brings me down. So lies and connection do come together. Both of them are bad news in the end.