Tag: my mother

Triangle about the reason why I blog

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triangle about the reason why I blog
Made in Canva by me

Why do you blog?

Daily Writing Prompt

Picture it (that’s what Sophia from Golden Girls started a story). It was 2013, and I started my 2nd blog on WordPress. I had one before, but I didn’t continue with it. I’ve been signed to WP much longer than I’ve blogged. But I digress. I only posted 5 posts in 2013. My mother had cancer, and she died the same year, so blogging was the last thing on my mind. It wasn’t until 2014 that I began to blog more often. The Daily Post was the reason why I continued. Oh, the Daily Post, those were the days. Zero to Hero challenge was the name of the game at the time. Blogging was and still is a way of sharing thoughts with other people. The triangle of my blogging is fun, learning, and sharing. Those are the biggest reasons why I blog.

When I started writing this blog, the posts did not include images, and I didn’t think many people would find or read the blog. Sometimes, I was frustrated, and I didn’t know if I would continue with it. But I didn’t give up. I thought I would write for myself and simultaneously learn to write in English (in British English spelling). Blogging is about learning; you get better at it when you practise. I started to put images on posts randomly in 2015. Now, there are images on all of my posts. It does look better instead of only text. This is what you learn during the years you blog. Just like in real life, you live and learn.

Blogging is fun and even better when you can share your thoughts. I’m glad people have found my blog. This is my 10 years of regular blogging. The most active traffic to my blog was in 2020. I don’t know why since I have 965 followers, but not very active ones. Maybe I’m losing my touch. The truth is, blogging isn’t the way it used to be. I’m not that into it, but I still will continue with it. I love writing, and I do it as a hobby. Business blogging is different, and this is not one of those. I have read about it online and have been taking free courses. This blog is about my personal opinions and experiences. I’ve written so much English I don’t think I can write a blog in my own languages, Finnish and Swedish. It’s taken a long time to get where I am today in the blog world. I’m glad I didn’t stop blogging. I’ve got lovely comments and likes on my post. I shouldn’t forget why I started blogging in the first place. It wasn’t to get as many followers, comments and likes as possible (even if they are always welcome). It was about having fun writing, learning new things and sharing thoughts. I won’t understand those who “brag” about how many followers they have on social media. It’s not about quantity; it’s about quality. Those “followers” might be bots or glory hunters, not real followers. If you’re only starting out blogging, don’t give up. It takes time to hit it off. Starting a blog is easy, but updating it regularly and keeping the blog ideas rolling is the hardest. Getting followers to your blog might look impossible, but they will come to you with patience. It also depends on your blog and how much you promote it. The most important is that it keeps you motivated to blog. Don’t do it because everybody is; blog because you enjoy it. That’s how I keep blogging. It’s a bonus if someone else shares my views. This was my triangle as to why I blog.

Hazy shades of ambivalent

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Photo by Brett Jordan on Pexels.com

Many people don’t care about my unemployment, but I write about it anyway. It isn’t my fault no one wants to hire me. I got another rejection from a graphic design job. All those studies I had haven’t gotten me anywhere. I’m getting tired of trying to find something to apply to. I must apply for at least one monthly, or they will take my benefits away. I have ambivalent feelings about the whole job thing. I will never get experience when I can’t even get an internship. I’m getting too old for this shit. I feel like a failure when it comes to work. It’s like people think I want to be unemployed. I’m a healthy person, so that isn’t why I haven’t got a job. The only fault I have is my lack of work experience and my atopic skin, so I can’t do specific jobs. Other than that, I should get something. I only get suggestions for jobs I’m not suited for. I want to do something with graphic design and photography. But how can I get experience when I only get rejections?

I’m worried I’m not suitable for becoming an entrepreneur, either. Even if I had gone to a course about it. Getting people to notice you feels like hard work, and all that paperwork sounds overwhelming. I can’t decide what to do. I don’t have the confidence to succeed without having job experience in the field. I can hardly get any likes on my personal social media accounts. What if I don’t find clients, and if I do, how do I do things? It’s been a while since I designed anything. I try to make up fake projects, but I never have time. I have too much free time on my hands and too much sleep. If I had a good reason to wake up earlier, I would. I should get a grip on myself. I have no one who can give me a pep talk anymore. My late mother was good at that. My late dad wasn’t the same since he had other things on his mind. He had a business, so entrepreneurship should be in my blood. He made jewellery, but my field is different. My cousin has a business, and also my late grandfather, who I never met because he died when my mother was a child. A few people in my family tree were entrepreneurs, so it wouldn’t be surprising if I decided to do it, too.

If there is a positive thing about being unemployed, it is that I can do things that interest me. I can go places without having to think about whether I get off work or not. The downside is the financial side, and the other is not having human contact. Life can become one-sided if you don’t do something else for a change. I wish I wasn’t forced to apply for jobs when there is nothing suitable to apply to. There is more to life than wasting your time on writing applications. Especially when you know you won’t even get an interview. I wish I could leave this wheel of job search forever. I can either accept my current fate or do something about it.

“Why are these things never clear” Captain Jack Sparrow in Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End

Dancer in the dark

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dancer in the dark
Photo by Khoa Vu00f5 on Pexels.com

My late mother loved to dance, and her aunt was a professional dancer. My late father met my mother at a dance. But me, no, I’m the one who only dances in the dark and alone. I like watching other people dance, though. I watched the Finnish version of Dancing with the Stars, which my mother also watched. I feel my feet don’t cooperate with my brain. I hated discos in school. Dancing was too embarrassing. Other people watching me feel awkward. Maybe they wouldn’t care how I dance, but I don’t want to do it in public.

We had ballroom dancing in one class in school, but even then, I didn’t dance. It isn’t my thing. It’s good exercise, but I don’t care. It isn’t my kind of fun. I once applied to dance education, but luckily, it got cancelled. I don’t know why I applied. It was one of the first education I did after compulsory school, so I had to apply for something. I couldn’t imagine being a dancer. I’m too clumsy for that. I admire people who are great dancers. People who can dance like Michael Jackson are amazing. Especially young kids. For me, it’s easier to dance in my head than for real.

I will remain the dancer in the dark, and there I should stay. I leave the dance to those who like it and can do it right. I will remain to be the viewer.