Achievement doesn’t come easy

Puzzle bits on a brown table
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Life is a challenge. To achieve something, you need to go through a long process. You can’t wait for things to happen. Achievement doesn’t come easy. It doesn’t need to be anything significant. Some people think that if you haven’t achieved anything big, you haven’t had any real success. But that doesn’t define it. If you’ve struggled through and overcome a problem, that’s an achievement. You don’t need to be wealthy, famous or popular among other people to feel you’ve succeeded in something.

My achievements might not mean anything to others, but for me, they’re everything. They are all my personal achievements. There have been times I wanted to quit, but I kept going anyway. I studied things I wanted, but there was always a doubt that it might not be the right one. I never wanted long-time studies. Two years are the longest. I couldn’t do something that took 4 years or more. Especially when I get older. It’s a shame that despite my efforts in all that studying, I have never got a job. Only one, but that was two years ago, and I was still technically unemployed. Maybe I’m just not that good after all. I don’t have any achievements when it comes to jobs. It feels like I’m being left out. If it’s a job search or posting things on social media. I just want to give them both up because it’s all in vain. Even blogging feels like a waste of time. It’s not easy to stay motivated when everybody else seems to succeed in what they do. Maybe people have forgotten that when someone posts online are supposed to be active. Like posts, maybe comment. Perhaps I’m too dull, and the things I post are uninteresting to others. It might sound pathetic, but I like my own posts on social media because then, at least, it doesn’t feel unnecessary.

It’s not easy trying to achieve something. Maybe it’s easier for some. For me, getting a driver’s license is a big deal. In a month, it’s been a year. I thought I never would get through the driving lessons and the theory. I failed it 26 years ago, but now it is easier. I wish people would have been more excited for me, but I guess it’s no big deal. I was glad to have achieved it. It’s gonna take a lot of practice to get better at it. I have only driven my dad’s car alone once, but that was only a short drive, and there wasn’t much traffic. Driving on the motorway is too scary, and I don’t like driving in traffic. It takes more than a year to learn the process of driving a car. As long as I don’t drive into something or someone, then it’s okay.

I enjoy the small achievements I get. Getting this post finished is one of them. I don’t know what else to do to get some attention to it, but I still write for myself, and that should be enough for me.

Blowing one’s horn

Musicians blowing in traditional German horns
Musicians blowing in traditional German horns by Markus Spiske is licensed under CC-CC0 1.0

Blowing my own horn is not my thing. That must be one of the reasons why I can’t find a job. I don’t know how to brag about myself. It’s also a Finnish thing. We’re not good at it. It’s also an introvert thing. We don’t want to brag about ourselves and make ourselves something special. We like to be low key. But that doesn’t seem to be acceptable in the world. You’re nothing if you don’t want to blow your own horn. It shouldn’t be that way. We should be allowed to be ourselves and not pretend to be something we’re not. Some people seem to have problems with quiet people. Only because you don’t want to be a blabbermouth doesn’t mean you’re strange. Listening to people talk about things you don’t care about is stressful. Noisy people have the same effect.

Because I don’t want to blow my own horn, I don’t know if I could be a good entrepreneur. You need to be a lot of different things. A marketing person, a salesperson, a public speaker and someone who doesn’t give up easily. Most importantly, be good enough at what you do. Maybe it’s only me who thinks I’m good at something. Perhaps the reason why I won’t get hired is that I’m not good enough. They instead take someone with natural talent. I don’t have an impressive portfolio, and I don’t have what the employers are looking for. I’m not confident in blowing my own horn. No matter what I post on social media, I get some likes and sometimes nothing. If I don’t get much attention in my personal accounts, how can I get it on the business one? If I get any comments, it’s usually spam. I wouldn’t trust anyone. I feel it’s unnecessary work if I promote things on social media. It’s not easy to be ignored as a job seeker or/and an entrepreneur. I don’t know how to say something about myself or what I can do. At least when it comes to making it to words. It’s incredible how things disappear from your head when you should think about them. It has nothing to do with memory problems. I tend not to think about complicated stuff like that.

Maybe I’ve chosen the wrong path when it comes to careers. It seems you need to blow your own horn because the competition is tough. There are so many people in the design business, and I don’t know how to stand out. Maybe my destiny is to be without a job. I never wanted an ordinary job, but it has backfired. Only because I don’t know how to blow my own horn.

No work, no play makes her bromide

Photo by Martino Grua on Pexels.com

Sometimes I feel people think I’m a bromide person, especially on social media. My life is not exciting. I have no work, and my interests are not excited either. At least not what other people have. Even if I did work, I still wouldn’t write about it. Life is more than work anyway. People who talk about it a lot have nothing else in their life. Only because I don’t go to parties or anything other people call fun. It isn’t my kind. For me, fun is watching movies, doing things I like, watching comedies, take a bike trip, listening to music. If there are people who think that’s dull, then too bad. I don’t go around telling people parties are boring. I don’t like loud people and loud noises. It’s idiotic and boring to act like an imbecile. I despise that kind of behaviour. I don’t get many followers on Instagram or Twitter. I’ve had Instagram since 2016, and I only have 25 people. The most likes on a post have been 25 or 26. I’ve been on Twitter since 2009, and I only have 75 followers. I’ve never been popular in real life, and I’m not that on social media either. It’s a mystery why some people get many followers, and some not so much. I don’t really mind how many I have, but sometimes it feels useless to post anything. Especially when it comes to posting photos. It was a disappointment in the beginning, but now I don’t expect to get more than 10 likes. Even if I don’t get a single like, I still will be posting on social media. I’m used to “talking to a wall.” Using social media for fun is just that. I don’t care if some people find me bromide. They just don’t know me. Who does care if a person is dull or not? It’s only a matter of opinion. Not everyone can or want to draw attention to themselves.

One of the reasons while I fail in job interviews is that I can’t play fake. They expect you to be something you’re not. You can’t be yourself even if they say you should. That’s only in some kind of fantasy world. The other reason I won’t get hired is that I have nothing special to offer to them. I don’t know why you should be like a celebrity or glamourous to get a job. I’m only a blank and bromide person with a grey personality. Getting chosen for a job is like gym in school, always getting picked last. You know you’re good at sport, but other people still don’t choose you. We all can’t be Youtube stars. The world needs plain people. If someone sees me as bromide, then it’s not my problem. I know myself better than anyone else, and that’s what matters.