Resisting a temptation

sweet things collage
Made with Canva. Cookie photo by me.

Everyone has weaknesses and resisting a temptation is not easy. Unless you have great self-control. I usually have. I never tried smoking or drinking alcohol like a lot of people. I wasn’t one of those who followed my friends examples. But don’t think I don’t have bad habits. I’m no angel but things I can’t resist isn’t disturbing like e.g. smoking.

My weakness has always been sweet things. Like candy/sweets. When it comes to beverages it’s soft drinks. I began a test at the beginning of January by not drinking soft drinks at all. People have an alcohol free month in January so I thought I would try the same with soft drinks. It wasn’t because I drank too much of it or to lose weight. I did it because I wanted to test my own self-control. I thought I couldn’t resist the temptation. January was over and I still hadn’t bought any soft drinks. So I decided to continue with the strike. Months went by and still didn’t buy them.

But guess what? I made it. Now it’s soon been 6 months and no soft drinks. That’s a milestone to be proud of. I haven’t even had the urge to buy any and I think I’ll continue this trend. I have bought non-alcoholic cider and different juices though. The test was for soft drinks and not that so it doesn’t count. Life is too short to count calories and stop enjoying foods that are too bad for you. Too much is too much. I don’t believe in dieting. As long as you don’t get too overweight and you keep your eating habits under control. Being too thin is not good. I rather enjoy life than spend my time wondering what food is bad or good.

I told my dad about my no soft drink policy and he asked if it had changed anything. I don’t know, that wasn’t the main thing, I replied. The point was resisting temptation and not to get results. Maybe it has had an effect on my teeth. Or not since I still eat sweets. I really try to eat less of that too. Once a sweet tooth, always a sweet tooth. I think I always gonna eat them but don’t think eating is all I do. I also exercise and that’s mainly walking or cycling. I made 2 long bike trips this week and the weather was kind of hot. If you eat fattening foods, you should also move your body and not just sit still. You don’t need to go to the gym to exercise. Going outside is much more fun and you get some air to breathe.

After every milestone, you should award yourself with something sweet. It doesn’t even need to be candy/sweets. It can be a fruit of any kind. Nothing beats candy/sweets though. You can eat it as much as you can but if you don’t stop at least for some time, it will come back and bite you in the… I have stopped drinking soft drinks and that’s sure is resisting a temptation. I award myself with a glass of water. Cheers!

If you can’t find a story to read, write your own

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What indulgence means to me is making up stories for my own pleasure. I love writing fan fiction. In English only. I have a lot of ideas but they all don’t become stories. I used to read other people’s stories but sometimes I didn’t find any interesting enough. So I began writing them myself. If you can’t find a story to read, write your own. I guess the same goes for blogging. I wanted to write things I like. It’s just a bonus someone else likes them too.

Most of my fiction is about people who exist. But I don’t write about them. It’s a made-up story. It’s just the names that are the same. Maybe some fact too but it’s nothing personal. I’ve written fanfiction about movie characters but my main interest is real person fiction. If someone finds them offensive it’s not really my problem. It’s just harmless fun. You should do things that make you happy and writing fanfiction is mine. I haven’t had any complains so far. I only write them for fun and I won’t make a profit of them. Sometimes you just need an escape from the real world.

I also write fiction because they have improved my English. I’m not a book reader so reading other people’s fan fiction is my thing. Writing is something I enjoy so why stop? I have quite a vivid imagination. I’ve noticed I don’t really know how to write nice characters. They always have some kind of anger issue, if you can call it that. Or telling others what to do. But that’s because my muses usually give me thoughts like that. Oops, revealed too much 😀 You know a writer never tells their secrets to others. At least not me. If I don’t write fanfiction, I write poems. Ideas just come naturally to me when it comes to imagination. I wish I could use that skill in other things in life.

I can find inspiration from anywhere or anything. Like yesterday I saw a title on a forum and it gave me ideas for a story. An idea only though. I got so much inspiration so it feels like there is no time to write them all down. I have to think about the real life too, you know. I hardly end the stories I write because I get bored and then I make up new stories. There needs to be a special feeling when I write and when there isn’t I get writer’s block. I guess it’s the same with blogging. If I don’t have the feeling to write something then I don’t write at all. Or then I’m just tired and I don’t want to think. That’s why writing will remain a hobby for me. And what a fun hobby it is.

What I value in friendships

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I’m old enough to know what I value in friendships. I haven’t been that lucky with that. From my past experiences I’ve learned what I don’t like in a friend. I’ve written about friendships before on this blog. You can find a few links about it at the end of this post. I have a few precedents of it so I know what I’m talking about.

The most important thing is honesty. A person who pretends to be my friend and then find someone else has no place in my life. I had a friend in school like that. There were days when she chose that other girl to spend her time with. I was just a substitute when she had a disagreement with the other one. With honesty, I don’t mean you should judge someone by the way they dress or something like that. Honesty is telling you they have another friend and not pretending they want to be your friend. I rather be told they don’t want to spend time with me than being ignored. It hurts more than honest words. If someone doesn’t want to be my friend they shouldn’t pretend to be so. Fake friends are easy to find. It’s the honest ones you have to search for with cats and dogs. If you had bad experiences of friendships, it’s no wonder you don’t want to get close to anyone or let people in your life.

I value respect in a friend. Someone who accepts you for who you are. A true friend doesn’t tell others how to dress or trying to look a certain way. Friends should respect others opinions and don’t start a fight over something they don’t agree with. We can’t always agree but you shouldn’t stop being a friend because they don’t agree with you. They shouldn’t talk crap behind your back. A true friend doesn’t make up rumours. I don’t know if my so-called friends made up some rumour and frankly I don’t care. They had no respect for me because if they did they wouldn’t have ignored me. A friend who spreads rumours is no friend. Maybe their own life is so empty so they have to make up things. Respect is also about supporting a friend in their life choices. If it’s about careers or relationships. A friend doesn’t put you down and saying you’re doing it wrong or you don’t have what it takes. Being supportive is true friendship.

Trustworthiness is important in any relationship. If you can’t trust a friend, you can’t really be a real friend. I don’t remember if I ever told anyone a secret but that’s not the only way to lose trust in a person. If a friend pretends to be a friend but still doesn’t have any respect for you, you can’t confide in that person with anything. The risk can be that the person tells the other friend what you have told your friend. So you keep things to yourself instead. Once you lose trust in a person it’s difficult to get it back. Sometimes it’s lost for good. It’s better to find new friends than trying to get the trust back. I’m happy I didn’t need to have these people in my life. I went to a Finnish Swedish school and when I got a Finnish only school, I didn’t see the old classmates anymore. I haven’t had any problems like this in my adult life. I’m just more careful when it comes to friendships.

I don’t deny my past experiences haven’t affected my life because they have. It hasn’t made me weaker though. Actually, it’s the opposite. The problem is not about trusting people, it’s about finding someone who has the same interests. Or at least have something in common with. I haven’t found anyone like that in real life. They always seem to be in a different wavelength than me. A true friend is someone you can confide in. They don’t judge you and you can say anything to them without having to worry they don’t want to continue the friendship. When I meet new people I always have to think before speaking so I don’t say too much. I wish I wouldn’t need to worry about that. Since I never had a friend who stands by me no matter what happens, I don’t really know what that’s like. Maybe I find that kind of friendship when I’m really old. Friendships don’t see age. In life, you never know. A friend can appear from anywhere. In this case, patience is a virtue.

Old posts of friendship
Partner in crime
Nothing on the horizon
Hey, fake person