I’ve never had a sobriquet because my first name is short. I had a nickname before my parents gave me a name but that’s about it. I don’t really mind. I prefer giving people a sobriquet but I don’t tell them of course. What’s the fun in that? It’s usually to neighbours who annoy me. Or people in general who act idiotically and those are everywhere. The sobriquets are not very nice but people like that don’t deserve better. It’s never anything personal. If it was someone I know, it would only be nice ones. People should really think before they act so they don’t need to be called names. I guess that’s too much to ask.

What I call people isn’t really rude. Since it’s only for myself, no harm is done. I wouldn’t go and say things to peoples faces. To smokers, for example, I call them chimneys or cancer stick suckers but it’s really their addiction and not mine. They can smoke themselves to death as long as I can breathe clean air. They annoy me the most when they pollute my air. Some smokers seem to think they can do what they want. They can even smoke in front of their children which I’ve seen a couple of times lately. They must really have small brains (pea-brains) if they think it won’t affect others. Second-hand smoking is the worse and it’s also bad for pets. I feel sorry for those who are close to smokers and even more those who are slaves of tobacco. They also must have tar legs because they can’t move away from doors or their balconies. I don’t think they even realise themselves that they are addicted to the stuff. There are ways to quit but they find all the excuses in the book not to. Nothing is easy but if you don’t even try, you’re just lazy.

People not having common sense is a good victim for me. People who don’t understand there are other people around. You see that the most when you live in a department building. They slam their front door no matter what hour. Door slammers I call them. Then people who put the light on when it midday, Light switchers. The worst are they once who can’t manage something simple. They can’t close doors or gates. There is a Finnish word for it but not so much in English. It’s ‘uusavuton’ It’s a person who isn’t incapable of doing anything because of excessive pampering. I wonder how people like that survive this life. You can’t wait for other people to do things for you. If you can’t even put garbage in a bin, you really need help and fast. It seems to be difficult to be organised too. You see that in recycling. People throw their cardboard in the bin without breaking them first and then they think the box is full. How lazy and helpless can people be? I could name a lot of things people do wrong but I don’t want to be a complainer. I’m just gonna make up sobriquets for my own amusement. I’m weird like that.