I haven’t been that excited to blog recently. It’s been hot, rainy and, well, summer. I’ve been busy with other stuff. It’s called life. This post is a reminder that I’m still here for myself and others. I have nothing much to say.
I am getting excited to see Toto next week, though. The event changed places, so it’s not as close as it was. It’s also inside. I hope I don’t get covid.
I must be crazy for applying for the 3rd time for the same Helsinki Design School, but there I am again. I didn’t get a job after studying there for the last two. A lot of new experiences, yes, but that’s about it. This time it’s about making movies and the things that go with it. Some might think spending money on this school is wasted, but it’s my money. I don’t have time to study for more than a year. I get to go to places that I wouldn’t usually get to. Last time I got to go to an advertising company and a print company. Maybe it’s just another education to fill my resume, but at least I do something. It’s a part-time education, so I can search for employment or do something else on the side. I love learning new things. Call it unearthly, but that’s the way it is.
One of my first educations after elementary school was screenplay writing. There was also about filming and editing. I’ve loved movies since I was a kid, so it was natural that I applied for education about them. At the time, I thought about becoming a screenplay writer, but then my interests got elsewhere. I’ve seen behind-the-scenes footage for different movies a lot of times. People think it’s easy to make movies, but there are so many things you need to do. I studied the subject a long time ago so this education I’m going to will be a good update. I only recently realized that what I’ve studied in the past has a lot to do with movies. There are writing, graphic design and photography. The only thing that is missing is sounds, music and wardrobe. There are a lot of exciting things to study in the training program.
The education takes 11 months. Meeting in school two times a month and self-studying. There will also be visiting a film studio and professionals as teachers. There will be early mornings for me again, but in a way, they can be pretty nice. The education begins on October 12 and ends in August 2023. I’m looking forward to it. At least I have that if I don’t find something else to do. I don’t study anymore to get a job; I learn for myself. It’s only a plus side if I do get something else.
Life is a challenge. To achieve something, you need to go through a long process. You can’t wait for things to happen. Achievement doesn’t come easy. It doesn’t need to be anything significant. Some people think that if you haven’t achieved anything big, you haven’t had any real success. But that doesn’t define it. If you’ve struggled through and overcome a problem, that’s an achievement. You don’t need to be wealthy, famous or popular among other people to feel you’ve succeeded in something.
My achievements might not mean anything to others, but for me, they’re everything. They are all my personal achievements. There have been times I wanted to quit, but I kept going anyway. I studied things I wanted, but there was always a doubt that it might not be the right one. I never wanted long-time studies. Two years are the longest. I couldn’t do something that took 4 years or more. Especially when I get older. It’s a shame that despite my efforts in all that studying, I have never got a job. Only one, but that was two years ago, and I was still technically unemployed. Maybe I’m just not that good after all. I don’t have any achievements when it comes to jobs. It feels like I’m being left out. If it’s a job search or posting things on social media. I just want to give them both up because it’s all in vain. Even blogging feels like a waste of time. It’s not easy to stay motivated when everybody else seems to succeed in what they do. Maybe people have forgotten that when someone posts online are supposed to be active. Like posts, maybe comment. Perhaps I’m too dull, and the things I post are uninteresting to others. It might sound pathetic, but I like my own posts on social media because then, at least, it doesn’t feel unnecessary.
It’s not easy trying to achieve something. Maybe it’s easier for some. For me, getting a driver’s license is a big deal. In a month, it’s been a year. I thought I never would get through the driving lessons and the theory. I failed it 26 years ago, but now it is easier. I wish people would have been more excited for me, but I guess it’s no big deal. I was glad to have achieved it. It’s gonna take a lot of practice to get better at it. I have only driven my dad’s car alone once, but that was only a short drive, and there wasn’t much traffic. Driving on the motorway is too scary, and I don’t like driving in traffic. It takes more than a year to learn the process of driving a car. As long as I don’t drive into something or someone, then it’s okay.
I enjoy the small achievements I get. Getting this post finished is one of them. I don’t know what else to do to get some attention to it, but I still write for myself, and that should be enough for me.