Having a blast by myself

fireworks
Made in Canva

I like doing things by myself. I don’t need a lot of people around me. In fact, other people stress me out. I like having a blast by myself. It might sound boring for some but so is partying in my opinion. I hate all the noise and talking nonsense. That’s just not my thing and it has never been. When I’m around people, waiting to go home as soon as possible is my thing. Other people expect for you to be social and if you don’t speak, they say you’re anti-social. Like that’s a bad thing. I just don’t want to waste my time on something I don’t care about or want to do. It’s better to be alone than being with the wrong people. If you want to be with someone, you’ll never get the chance to be with that person because they live in another country or they already have someone to be with. Or they won’t like you the way you like them. You just have to accept it and try to think about something else than the company of another human being. There are other things to think about.

I go to the movies by myself because then you can concentrate on the movie. Even staying there until the end credits without having that other person to get irritated. I take bike rides alone. Sometimes it would be nice to have someone to talk to but not many want to take long bike trips. I used to do that with my mother when she was still alive. But now I only go by myself. I can cycle in my own pace and stop whenever I want. It’s really relaxing to be around silence. Yesterday I took one of this trips. It wasn’t long but still. It was to an outdoor museum where they have horses and sheep. There were some people there but it was still silent. A lot of beautiful colours on the trees and blue sky with sunshine. Here are some photos.

Nature has always been one of the greatest things in Finland. When tourist wonder why we want distance they should really experience this side of our country and then they might understand why.

Taking it easy is my kind of a blast. I think better when I’m alone. I tried to write out on the balcony one of my fictions but there was too much noise from the traffic so I always write inside. If someone kept talking I couldn’t concentrate. It different when I’m listening to music. Actually, I’m even more motivated when the music blasts in the background. Or since I listen to Spotify on my laptop, at the front. Not only when I write fiction but also when I write this blog. I get more distracted if the neighbours are coming or going from their flat. Or noise from the outside. All the small sounds irritate me but not the loud ones. Except if it’s the neighbour’s loud stereos where it doesn’t sound like music at all. Or the people shouting when they talk to each other. I can listen to music quite loud but still, I can concentrate. Sometimes I’m so in my thoughts I don’t even hear it’s being loud.

For some doing things alone can be difficult but for me, it’s in my nature. I never feel totally lonely even if sometimes it can feel like that. Some have a blast with other people but I’m having a blast by myself. You don’t necessarily need big things to have a blast. If pets get excited from a toy and kids get excited about something new they’ve learned. Adults should be able to have a blast from the small things in life too.

 

It’s not easy being an introvert

wooden bench in a sunset
Made in Canva

Making a phone call to a stranger? Speak in front of other people? Networking? Finding friends? Shopping for clothes? Think again. An introvert needs to brace themselves mentally before doing any of those. It can be easy if you’re an extrovert to just do it. It’s not easy being an introvert. Everything is a struggle and sometimes it feels you don’t belong in this extroverted world. You might feel differently than I do. It really depends what kind of a person you are. It doesn’t necessarily mean it’s because you’re an introvert. This post is about how I see it. Feel free to disagree.

What I dislike the most about being an introvert is other people pointing it out. I don’t need people saying I’m quiet and withdrawn. I won’t become what they want me to be. I don’t go around pointing out to talkative people for them to be quiet because that would be rude. Just because I don’t easily talk to strangers, it doesn’t mean I don’t want to get to know them. It just takes more time. Every time I go to Helsinki Design School my classmates don’t talk to me. They don’t ask me anything. Maybe it’s a Finnish thing. We only meet twice a month but still, they should be interested at least a little. Even it’s a struggle, I still try to talk to them. But it feels forced. I don’t like starting conversations. That’s why I don’t like networking. I get tongue-tied and I want to leave. It feels like people think I’m intellectually disabled because I give short answers if they ask something. Once when I went to business school, this classmates asked me if I had a drivers licence and of course I said no. And that was it. It was a really weird question. I don’t know what their point was. I didn’t talk to them so they tried to make fun of me or something. It’s probably only in my head I thought so. It doesn’t really matter what others think. They don’t know me. They only assuming what I’m like.

People seem to be in a hurry. If you don’t talk straight away, they don’t even bother getting to know you. They expect introverts to act like an extrovert because that’s what gives you success. Sorry, but being an introvert doesn’t work that way. We can’t just switch it off. Instead of competing against each other, we should learn from one another. Labelling doesn’t do anyone good. You would think people would want to get to know new people. But I guess you have to adapt to the extroverted society. It’s always been said you should be yourself and yet you shouldn’t be. So it must be OK if you’re extroverted but if you’re not you should change. No one should try to change you just because someone wants you to. I like to get away from people when I’m around others. Too much noise makes me tired. I don’t want to be something I’m not. Being an introvert shouldn’t be an issue. This planet is for everyone and we should all be in this together.