Everything but spartan

soap bubble with text on it
Made with Canva

I’m one of those people who feels most at home in my comfort zone. I’m everything but spartan. I like comfort and it takes a lot from me to get out of my bubble. Even introverts should get out of their comfort zone but it takes a lot for me to do so. I don’t easily try new things. It should be enough that I actually get out of bed every day. Especially now when it’s October, a bed is the best place to keep warm. But you have to go out sometime.

I both dislike and like routine. In the morning, or when I wake up, I like doing the same things. When it comes to work or education, I like it to be different from time to time. I like surprises too. I get bored so I need stimulation. I also learn things in practice. I hate reading so I never went to high school. In Finland it’s voluntary. I’ve never done anything out of the ordinary. I’m not impulsive either. I think probably a bit too much. I could do a lot of things if it could be done in the comfort of my own home. The other part of me wants to be around other people. I don’t want to be completely isolated. What is happening in the world, my little bubble looks more tempting. Besides, what is so wrong with people’s comfort zones that they need to step out of it? Maybe their goal in life is to experience as many things as possible before the time runs out. Mine is getting through the days and filling it with things that make me most comfortable. In some things, I wish I could be braver. If I was I would probably have achieved something more.

I think what has happened in my life has had an effect on a lot of things. The way I’m careful with my choices, for example. It’s easy to tell someone to do something if they haven’t experienced what the other has. Forcing a person to do something they’re not comfortable with isn’t the right way. The same by saying, do not just talk, do it. That’s not helpful at all. It just brings more anxiety. If you try to hurry things, nothing good will come of it. I’m everything but spartan but if you let me do things in my own time, I might get out of that so famous comfort zone.

Built a bastion around me

bastion
Fortress in Kajaani, Finland 2010

Built a bastion around me

I built myself a bastion around me

Past experiences have made me careful

I built a bastion around me so I would get less hurt

Get out of your shell but it just makes me want to build it higher

It takes a special person to break down my walls

I built a bastion to keep people away

Once you lost a trust it hard to get it back

Don’t treat people like dirt or they build a bastion of their own

Introvert problems

I got to get out of my comfort zone sometime. Wish me luck that I actually have the nerve to ask a stranger. Maybe it won’t be as bad as I think it is. If my class mates can do it, so can I.