Repost: Green with envy

green with envy
Made in Canva

Envy is one of the seven sins, but it’s also something you feel when you see someone succeeding better than you. There is good envy, and there’s bad envy. I don’t think I’ve ever had that bad envy feeling. I can be happy for another person. There is no point in fighting against something you know you’ll never win. It’s better to concentrate on your own things. You should stop comparing yourself to others, no matter how hard it might be. Some things are not meant to happen, and some things might happen later.

What makes me most green of envy is creative talents like illustrators and graphic designers. Even professional photographers. They make it look so easy even if it’s not. If I practised more, I could get better at it, but there are so many other things to do so I don’t have time. At the job I’m doing right now, there isn’t any photography. We use photos from Pixabay or any other photography place. Maybe I get to do that someday. I’m not that excited about taking photos like I was a few years ago. On dull days at work, I wish I was somewhere else. Mondays and Tuesdays are quiet, so I could be doing something else. I wonder why I even bother waking up early.

I’m green with envy when I read about how someone has started a creative business after their education. Like in Helsinki Design School. I’m both envious and admire their courage. Their work is good too. I feel like an amateur when it comes to coming up with ideas and how to make them a reality. I haven’t really done any graphic design since school in 2019. I don’t have enough confidence to start something on my own. Instead, I have to work somewhere else. But maybe this is a learning process. I get used to working with others and maybe learning something new on this journey. But right now, it feels like I won’t make it 8 months in this current job. Especially when I have to wake up early. I would rather stay in bed and start working when I feel like it. I made my bed, and now I have to lie in it.

Some might be green with envy of me, but they shouldn’t because we all got our strengths, and we should use them to help those who don’t have the same skills. Everyone can’t do everything, and it’s meant to be that way.


Adding to this old post on May 31, 2022. Some might feel a little envious that I will see Duran Duran in concert on Thursday, and on my birthday. Also, some might envy Finland for becoming world champions in ice hockey on home turf, and therefore breaking the curse. The end.

Fox on the run

Fox running

I’ve seen a fox in my neighbourhood a lot of times. It’s usually been at night. Once a fox walked past me on the street. Last year I saw a fox at least 8 times. I’ve never managed to take photos of one. I’ve seen a fox so many times I’ve lost count. It’s not easy to take pictures of wild animals because they move so fast.

I went to the cemetery, and I saw this fox. It’s far away, but I didn’t get closer, or it would have run away. I’ve seen one only once before in day time. They usually move at night. The first time I saw a fox was when we were driving home from Northern Finland, and I saw a glimpse of it from the car window.

Donnybrook within myself

Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

First of all, I got some disappointing news today. The concert of Elton John in Helsinki in 2023 won’t be happening. It’s all been cancelled. I was looking forward to it. But somehow, I knew this would happen. It’s was the 2nd concert that was cancelled that I was going to attend. The first one was Duran Duran in 2015 or so. It’s so typical. Most of the time, Finland is a place where bands and artists avoid it like the plague. The organisers didn’t find another place to have the concert in, so they cancelled it. It’s not like there aren’t other places in Finland to have it. Whatever the reason was, it’s disappointing the concert won’t happen. They offered tickets to see Elton in Stockholm, but that’s too expensive. I already paid 130 euros for the ticket. At least I will get my money back. I hope the concerts for Duran Duran and Toto won’t be cancelled. Or I might be cursed. Otherwise, there will be a donnybrook (in this case, a dispute) within me.

Speaking of a curse, I fell down on my face again on the pavement. I was walking down the street, and there was ice that I was breaking with my foot while walking. The pavement was cleaned from the sanding, but I just kept walking on the ice on the side of it. Then I stepped on the ice under a car and slipped forward, so I landed with my right hand and hit my face lightly on the ground. I broke my front tooth and got a scratch on my left knee. I also hurt my lower lip and a scratch on my upper lip. Fortunately, it didn’t need medical care. I cleaned the wounds myself. I went to the dentist a few hours later to get my teeth fixed. The last time I fell, it was worse. I broke two teeth, and I had to go to the ER. Both times I got sore muscles, and that was all. I should look where I am going. I don’t know why I didn’t stay in the middle of the pavement where there was no ice. But I was too tempted to break the soft ice. Sometimes my inner child doesn’t listen to reason. Especially when you get more accident-prone when you get older, you should be careful.

So that was the end of the week. Only bad news. But at least it’s been a peaceful one. The way things are going on in the world, this is only a small potato.