Swish and the time is gone

speed lines of a road
Made in Canva

It’s been a month since my last blog post. There are different reasons why I haven’t blogged in a while. Swish and the time is gone. I just haven’t had anything to write about. I haven’t been busy but I’ve had other things on my mind. And I sleep really late. I guess I have a lot of sleeping to catch up since I stopped my job. I have also watched a lot of movies on TV, so many late nights too.

So soon this year is over. I guess the top topics have been the coronavirus and US presidential elections. The other world news is all a blur to me. Personally, I had the job and then got laid off for a while. Then back to work. Now that is over. In private life, my dad had a falling accident about a month ago and then he went to a hip operation. Now he is in rehabilitation so I’ve been at my dad’s place. He’s probably coming back home this week. I’ve also been visiting him at the hospital. With a mask on, of course. So that’s about it.

Christmas is around the corner. It’s gonna be at home after some years of a break. Of course, it would be nice to go somewhere but, you know, the coronavirus is something not to be messed with. I for one don’t want it. Luckily I haven’t even got the cold which is great. I hope it won’t come either. I hate a stuffed nose and the sneezing. The coronavirus has gotten worse in Finland. One day there were over 400 who got it. There are still people who don’t wear a mask but they have their reasons. It’s not really comfortable but it wasn’t as bad as I thought. I don’t go anywhere anyway. Only to the store and visiting my dad at the hospital. I try to avoid people as much as I can. But I do that other times too anyway. I don’t actually mind this coronavirus. I don’t like touching things with bare hands and don’t care much about hugging either. I never got that handshake thing either. You can greet someone with just a ‘Hi’ and that’s it. The Japanese don’t use handshakes so why should I.

Only a swish and then the year is over. I don’t plan anything. I live in the present. I’ve thought about a few things what I could do. One of them is if I should get a driver’s license after all. My dad has always been the driver so I haven’t needed one. But now when he’s getting older and he can’t drive forever. I tried to get one when I was younger but I didn’t finish it. My mother was disappointed to spend all that money on it. But I realized I was too afraid to drive. Maybe I just wasn’t ready. What worries me is that I might not be ready this time either. I have gone without a license this long and I haven’t needed one. My mother never had one either. A lot of people don’t even want one. You can’t always get a ride where you want. When you go by public transport the problem is the schedules and other people. I don’t need a car because I can always borrow or rent one. My dad doesn’t want to drive long-distances anymore so maybe if I did have a license, we could drive somewhere the way we used to. The driving schools are much different than they were over 20 years ago or so. Sometimes I think I don’t really need a license but then there are days when I wish I had. Getting a job would probably be much easier too. At least there would be more options. If you feel too much pressure to drive on the street with others, then maybe having a driver’s license isn’t a good idea. Since I already been to driving school, driving would be easier to learn. I still remember how to start a car. The biggest problem would probably be the tests. I failed them so many times last time and you had to pay for them each time. That’s where the money went. I really have to think about what to do with this. Maybe that’s my goal in the summer of 2021. That and maybe find something to do for a living.

No need to hold my hand

Made in Canva

Actually, this coronavirus is a blessing in some way for me. My free time from work is now extended to April 13. That means it’s also during my real holiday, which is Easter. No need to hold my hand because I always know what to do. It’s the same if I didn’t have a part-time job. The only thing that it’s different is that I still get paid. Another thing is that no one wants to shake your hand. I never really understood why you have to do that when you meet a new person anyway. The same with the hug thing. Then there are fewer crowds around and you can walk around in peace. I’m not a person who likes to show emotions in public. It depends on what it is though. Couples holding hands is another thing. Are they afraid they get lost from each other or what. I just see no pointing in it. Kissing in public is also gross. Each to their own. Personally, I wouldn’t do it in public no matter how much in love I was. You can tell someone you care without touching.

I don’t need to hold anyone’s hand when it comes to choices. I’ve chosen to go my own way and not depending on friends or classmates. I’ve studied things I wanted to study and not what others have wanted. Some teenagers who went to high school only because their best friend did. But I could never have done that. By the time I was 17 I wanted to get out of school. High school wasn’t for me. Besides, I hate reading and I hate Math too. I prefer doing things which is one of the reasons why I’ve chosen to study creative things. Even though was first education was in healthcare but I only went because my mother said it was at least something. I’m actually grateful for that now. Otherwise, things could have been different. Some people would probably say, at least you would have better job opportunities if I’ve continued to study health care instead. But I hate needles and not a fan of blood either. I always thought you should study things that interest you and not because it pays well or there are more jobs available. I will rather be unemployed than be in a job I don’t like. I don’t why you should be pushed to do something you know you’re not suitable to do.

Advice is always welcome but I rather do my own decisions. I’m not driven by money or ambition. I’m driven by independence and feeling good about the things I do. There is no need to hold my hand. I can found out things on my own. Maybe I need guidance at first but then I can do it by myself. Maybe not when it comes to writing articles or making leaflets about events at work though. I’m still not confident enough when it comes to that. I still haven’t got used to the workplace ways of doing things. Learning that is now on hold because of this crisis we have in the world at the moment. Who knows how long that will take. I don’t need any hand-holding to that either because bacteria are everywhere and washing your hands after you touch stuff is no brainer. Certain people just don’t see the obvious so you need to hold their hand. Metaphorically speaking of course.