Repost: Green with envy

green with envy
Made in Canva

Envy is one of the seven sins, but it’s also something you feel when you see someone succeeding better than you. There is good envy, and there’s bad envy. I don’t think I’ve ever had that bad envy feeling. I can be happy for another person. There is no point in fighting against something you know you’ll never win. It’s better to concentrate on your own things. You should stop comparing yourself to others, no matter how hard it might be. Some things are not meant to happen, and some things might happen later.

What makes me most green of envy is creative talents like illustrators and graphic designers. Even professional photographers. They make it look so easy even if it’s not. If I practised more, I could get better at it, but there are so many other things to do so I don’t have time. At the job I’m doing right now, there isn’t any photography. We use photos from Pixabay or any other photography place. Maybe I get to do that someday. I’m not that excited about taking photos like I was a few years ago. On dull days at work, I wish I was somewhere else. Mondays and Tuesdays are quiet, so I could be doing something else. I wonder why I even bother waking up early.

I’m green with envy when I read about how someone has started a creative business after their education. Like in Helsinki Design School. I’m both envious and admire their courage. Their work is good too. I feel like an amateur when it comes to coming up with ideas and how to make them a reality. I haven’t really done any graphic design since school in 2019. I don’t have enough confidence to start something on my own. Instead, I have to work somewhere else. But maybe this is a learning process. I get used to working with others and maybe learning something new on this journey. But right now, it feels like I won’t make it 8 months in this current job. Especially when I have to wake up early. I would rather stay in bed and start working when I feel like it. I made my bed, and now I have to lie in it.

Some might be green with envy of me, but they shouldn’t because we all got our strengths, and we should use them to help those who don’t have the same skills. Everyone can’t do everything, and it’s meant to be that way.

Adding to this old post on May 31, 2022. Some might feel a little envious that I will see Duran Duran in concert on Thursday, and on my birthday. Also, some might envy Finland for becoming world champions in ice hockey on home turf, and therefore breaking the curse. The end.

An early birthday present

It’s the ice hockey world championships in Minsk at the moment. Ice hockey is a very big and important sport here in Finland. The tournament hasn’t gone very well until yesterday. Finland won against Canada which means, we are fighting for medals. A lot of people already had lost faith in the team. But they proved them wrong. Never underestimate the power of a Finn.

The most important thing in this post is, something good has happened in my life for a change. I haven’t even told my dad yet. I applied to a school called Helsinki Design School. They also have degrees like Graphic design and Fashion design. I applied to a Photographer’s degree. It’s a private school and it’s not cheap. They only take students that have motivation and real goals. They got the best teachers you could imagine. They’re all pros in their business. I wasn’t really sure first if I should apply or not. But when I did make that choice, it was a good one.




I was a bit sceptic if I could get in or not. The application was done on the internet so it was pretty easy. The most difficult thing was, why should I be the one to get it. Mostly about goals and motivations. I sent the application May 8 and the answer came today, May 24. I almost lost hope for a while. But just a while. In my mind I kept wishing and wishing. I didn’t want to jinx it so I didn’t say it out loud. Sometimes I’m pessimistic about things. I give up too easily. I should really have more faith.

What really appealed to me about this school was the great opportunity to learn photography from real pros. Their the one’s that knows how the business works. I also liked the way the school presents itself. Positive attitude, breaking the rules of learning, helping the students to reach their goals. I really hope this will help me get better opportunities and meet new people. The school is also situated in the centre of Helsinki which suits me perfectly. I’ve been there so many times, I almost know it like my home town. You only have to attend the school once a month. Other times it’s self learning and doing assigments.

You should never take things for granted. Things are really not as bad as it looks. I should remember that.