Don’t think I’ll live that long

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Photo: Pexels

What are your thoughts on the concept of living a very long life?

Writing Daily Prompt

Quoting, Who Wants to Live Forever, A song by Queen. I don’t think I will have a long life. I think it has to do a lot with your genes and not with how healthy your life is. Some people die without having to do much, and then some people smoke and drink alcohol but still live a long life. None of my relatives have lived to their 90s. Except for my Dad’s half-sister, I don’t know if she’s still alive. Her kids don’t tell me anything. She was at least 91 years old in 2023.

My big sister died when she was 10 due to illness in 1983. My Dad’s mother passed away at 81 in 1989, and my mum’s mother died when she was 86 in 2003. She had a stroke and lived in a retirement home for 10 years before passing away. Mum died when she was 68 from cancer in 2013. Then, my Dad died at 79 of pancreatitis last year. On March 8, it will be a year. I don’t think I’ll have a very long life. I wouldn’t know what to do with the life I’ve been given. One thing is for sure: the world will be different in 30-35 years. You don’t know how much life you got because anything can happen. I wouldn’t want to live forever. There are enough problems in the present.

I think I don’t want to look further than what might happen this year or in a couple of months. I always try to be careful in anything I do. You can’t choose at what age you’re going to die. Your life can end in a blink of an eye, or you might be lucky enough to live a long life. Even if you’re careful, you can still meet bad luck, so you never know. You can only hope for a long life, but nothing is certain. Death will come no matter what. Life is for the living, and you should be able to live it the way you want. As long as it doesn’t disturb others, you might get a long life if you want it. Try to get along with others, and you will avoid many problems.

Advent Calendar 2024 – Day 11

Christmas balls, stars and light part 11
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Day 11

The journey to the end of the year 2024 is going on. The year wasn’t the way I thought it would. My dad died, and that’s something I didn’t think would happen so soon. I hoped he would have lived as long as possible, but you don’t always get what you want. I didn’t think my mother would have passed away at 68 years of age. On Sunday, it’s been 11 years. You don’t think about the day your parents die when you’re younger. You only live your life, and you don’t think about it. I had classmates who lost one of their parents when they were in school, but I never thought I would lose mine as early as I did. It doesn’t matter what age you are; losing a loved one is never easy. You might as well be 5 years old. Except when you’re older, you know what it means. When I lost my big sister in 1983, I was only 6 years old, and luckily, I didn’t remember much about it. My dad used to say that I was smiling more before her death. It does change your whole life when you’re at the start of it. It’s tough, especially for the parents, to lose a child. We took a trip to Europe to get past the sorrow. We went to Germany, the Italy-Austrian Alps, Denmark and Switzerland. It was cheaper because I travelled for free. It was possible in the 1980s, and I don’t think you can do that anymore. Getting away was one way to handle grief. You get other things to think about.

I have to make my journey on Earth without them. I still have good memories of them and can always return to photos and videos. I believe things happen for a reason. When you experience life challenges, you get mentally stronger. You need to because life goes on, and you make the most of it. The loved ones want you to move on because life is for the living. There is a time and place for everything. My next journey is the Christmas cruise to Tallinn, which I’m looking forward to. It will be different without Dad. At least I don’t need to ask anyone else where to go.

My motivation is not fiction

Photo: Openverse

What motivates you?

Daily Writing Prombt

It’s easier to say what doesn’t motivate me because it depends on my mood. Feelings are usually controlling my life. Sometimes, I don’t feel like doing anything, but other times, my motivation is high. I like those days because then I know I’ve done something. When things don’t go the way I wish, I get frustrated. I don’t like doing things that are done in vain. I’ve studied things where the money went down the drain, even if I did learn something from those times. I didn’t get a job, which is the biggest lie ever. “Get a degree and the doors to heaven open” – kind of thing. It doesn’t work for everyone. Education is not the only factor that gets you a job. You also need luck and good connection skills. I only have the feeling people have something against me. That’s only fiction in my head. Maybe my motivation is not getting into a position some people are. People in the world have more significant issues than I do. The way things are going in the world, it would be no surprise if worse things could happen to me, too. Be happy with what you have because tomorrow, they might be gone.

I should know. All my family members are gone, and only me left. No one can take their place. When I go outside, I see why I want to go back inside. No one will give me the same security as my family did. What I miss the most about them is having someone to talk to. It’s not the same with other people. The only relative I have some contact with is my cousin, but she has her family and business to take care of. The last time I met her was at my dad’s memorial service. But if I wanted her help or something, then she would. I’m motivated without relatives. Most of them didn’t keep in touch after my sister died in 1983. I have managed without them, so I don’t need them either. I’m not part of the Modern Family TV series, after all. My dad was in contact with his half-sister, but he didn’t get in touch with her when he was in hospital. I couldn’t get any contact with her either after Dad died. She was over 90 years old, so maybe she didn’t live at home anymore, or perhaps she died. Her kids didn’t inform us about anything anyway. Nice relatives there. Who needs a relative bothering you all the time. It’s better to be estranged from relatives you were never close to anyway than trying to connect with people who don’t care anyway.

I can stay motivated as long as I can do it in peace. If too many distractions distract me, I don’t get things done and don’t like to rush things. Getting support from others keeps me motivated. My parents, especially my mother, were good at that. She told me I should do the best I could and that I could do anything that I put my mind to. My parents didn’t pressure me into any occupation, and I could make my own decisions. That’s what every parent should do, let their kids become anything they want. You don’t need to be the best. We all have our strengths, and we should focus on them. It’s a shame the world has become the way it is today. Defining success with how much you make or how many followers you have on social media. If you haven’t, you have failed and aren’t worth anything. There is so much greed and selfishness that it’s not funny anymore. If you don’t fight it, you’re part of the problem. It motivated me to be different from others. I hope I never become the person some people are. I could never be cruel intentionally because I have a conscience and sympathy for others. It comes from past experiences and a good upbringing. I wish I could do more than blog about the wrongs in the world, but that’s the closest I can get. It might not reach the world, but at least my motivation is not fiction. These are my genuine thoughts about this. I blog to share my thoughts with others, and when someone likes a post and maybe leaves a comment, I feel motivated to go on. Even if I don’t get any, I can still keep the mood on good terms. Worse things could happen like AI writing my posts instead of me. Then Terminator movies might come true. As long as I’m not a robot, things will be fine.