Bloganuary: I wanna be loved by you

rock giving a heart to another smaller rock
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Can you share a positive example of where you’ve felt loved?

Bloganuary 2024

The words, I love you, have never been used in my home. But caring about one another is love, too. You don’t need to say those words. Showing that you care is love, which is more important. If you love me, show me how I say.

I feel love when someone shows they care. My parents have shown me they do. Especially my mother. She was also dedicated to how I did in school and kept in touch with my teachers. She always worried about me. Sometimes, it was a little too much for my liking. Even when she was sick, she still worried about how I would manage. I knew she meant well, even if it sometimes agitated me. Now, there are times I wish she was still alive. I wouldn’t need to meet all the problems that might be ahead with my father. Honestly, I’ve felt a little lost after she passed away. She knew about things my father didn’t, so I could ask her for advice. My father always thought about his work, so my mother was the caretaker. This wasn’t a positive example because it also brought sadness.

If I could hatch again from the eggshell of life, I wish I could have the same family without illnesses and deaths. My big sister was a significant part of my life. It was short, but I felt loved by her. She was excited when I was born. I was only 6 when she died, so I don’t have many memories of her besides the photos and videos of her. Sometimes, I think about how things would be if she were still alive. Losing a family member at an early age changes a person. Thinking about the positive memories makes it feel better.

sisters
Me and my big sister, Nina

The closest people in your life make you feel loved. When the world gets cold, your family is the one to count on. They don’t need to say they love you because those are only words. Showing them how is the key to one’s life.

Bloganuary: Step back in time

clocks
Photo by Tima Miroshnichenko on Pexels.com

Day 21. If I could step back in time, I would return to my childhood at the beginning of the 1980s. My family was complete then. Both of my grandmothers were alive, and my sister. I would relive those times when I was a small child. You have no problems, and you live a carefree life. I don’t remember much about that time. There are bits, but it would be nice to see how it was then. I miss Christmases the most. We always spend it within the family, and when my sister died in 1983, things weren’t the same again. Our family got smaller and smaller. It’s only me and dad left now. We have different videos of the times we spent together, so I can go down memory lane when I want to remember how it was. And photos, of course.

I would also like to see how my life would have been if things had turned some other way. How my sister would be like as an adult. Maybe the death of our mother would have been a bit easier. Or what if mother hadn’t died so soon. Thinking about these things are needless because life is what it is. Everybody dies one day. It would be nice to go back in time, but what happened then is in the past. You should live in the present because that’s something you can control. But playful thinking has never done anyone any harm.