Tag: work

Been here before

MiaLeave a comment
red and white neon sign
Made in Canva

Some disappointing news first. The Elton John concert was supposed to be this year in Helsinki, but now it’s been postponed to 2023. No new date yet. This is some kind of déjà-vu. Some years ago, a concert was postponed that I was going to attend. Then there were no new dates added, so I didn’t get my money back because I waited too long. The concert was only 50 euros though. Now it’s happened again. I’m not sure I want to go to see Elton John after all. I’m not that big of a fan. He’s just one of my favourite artists. It’s gonna take ages to the concert, and maybe it won’t happen at all. Then it might be too late to get the money back. No one knows what gonna happen until 2023. You can get very ill and die. Maybe I don’t feel like going at all. The ticket wasn’t that cheap, so it would be a shame if I can’t get the money back. At first, I thought, I won’t go after all, but I’m not sure now. If I decided not to go or something else comes up, I hope I get a refund. It would be nice to see him live, though. It’s his farewell tour, after all.

The UX/UI course ended. Every time I study something, and it ends, it feels like I’ve been on the same page before. I have to start things over again. I never get anywhere, job-wise. What is the point of all of this studying if it never pays off? It only gives me something to do, and learning something new is always nice. It feels I repeat things. If it comes to writing this blog or fan fiction. I try to do things differently, but I get the deja vu feeling. It seems that same feeling comes when I see job suggestions on LinkedIn. I don’t why I get things like teaching jobs. Do my profile show I have any education about that? No, the same with some expert jobs. You can’t even stop those suggestions from coming. I wouldn’t be a very good teacher anyway. Also, the tips people share about how a resume should be like are coming out of my ears. If you have nothing interesting to add, it doesn’t matter how they look like. It’s only repeating the same old things.

I can’t think of anything else to say about deja vu.

I can’t think of anything else to say about deja vu. Oh, there it was again 😀

To be or not to be, that is the question

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people on crossroad
Photo by Henry & Co. on Pexels.com

That’s all the Shakespeare I know. Life is full of questions. Besides the question, what the hell did Shakespeare talk about. One of them is what to do for a living. I don’t know why some find it easily, but for some, it takes years. I thought I had found it, but now it doesn’t feel right either. I’m just not ambitious enough, and I don’t have dreams to fulfil. At least something I don’t have the courage to do. Maybe my destiny is to be unemployed. I thought about entrepreneurship, but I haven’t thought about it for a while. I don’t think I’m good enough, and there is so much work. Maybe it isn’t for me after all. Marketing yourself and finding clients. I thought of trying to find a job somewhere else.

I’ve tried to search for something to apply for, but there isn’t much. If there is, I don’t have enough experience. They say you should try anyway, but writing applications are too difficult to write, so I don’t want to bother. It feels waste of energy to do something I know I won’t get. I’m not an expert on any programs, but who is because you can always learn more. Calling myself a professional doesn’t feel right. I feel more like an amateur. In design, a portfolio of your best work is important, but mine isn’t any good. I don’t get an internship because I’m too old. They only take students and young people. It’s a bit embarrassing to ask to be an intern at my age. I don’t have anything to offer them anyway.

Maybe I should only study something instead. Even if it won’t get me a job. I would at least have something to do. I’ve thought about marketing, but we’ll see about that. This post might sound pessimistic, but these are only questions I’m thinking about. To be or not to be, that is the question, like in Shakespeare’s play ‘Hamlet.’ Mine are only different kind.

Going around like the carousel

MiaLeave a comment
fast moving carousel with lights
Photo: Free photo

My life seems to go around like a carousel—a slow one. At least when it comes to jobs. My birthday was on Wednesday. I only got three congrats on Facebook. But it’s no big deal. I only turned 44. Birthdays are no big deal for me anyway. Unfortunately, age seems to be an issue for some people. I say to those people, talk to the hand. Age is a state of mind.

I have things to do that keeps me occupied, so I don’t have time to think that my life is going around like a carousel. I have that driving lesson thing and the UX/UI design thing. The summer weather is also here, so who has the time to look for a career. I won’t find one either. You can have all the educations in the world, but that doesn’t mean you will find a job. No matter what people claim. You need to have job experiences and a college degree, which I don’t have. Then LinkedIn suggests jobs that I’m certainly not suitable for. Like marketing. I’m not any good at that. Why should I waste time on writing applications to places I won’t get anyway? Am I not taking someone else’s job, someone who has studied the subject? I don’t believe in applying for jobs that I don’t have an education for. They said you should apply for any job, but that’s a waste of time for the applicant and the one who reads the applications. I just become something where there are jobs. I need experience from the occupations I have studied and not experiences from working. I know the rules of working in general.

At the moment I want to concentrate on the current things. Taking baby steps is better than trying to hurry. I don’t mind being in the current carousel of life. Sometimes I wish there could be more, but that feeling is just passing.