Category: Writing challenges

Contains of both Daily Writing Prompts and RagTag Daily Prompts.

Listening to the voices in my head

MiaLeave a comment

Can’t Stand Me

When I read the daily post subject of today I thought it was about what you dislike about yourself. But when I saw it’s about what’s worse, hearing your own voice or seeing yourself on video, it’s almost right.
I would say my voice. It’s OK when I talk and record my voice but when I hear it in something else, then it’s horrible. I heard my voice on the radio once when I won a competition and I sounded like my mother. That’s the least thing you want to sound like. When I answered a phone, the person on the other end thought I was her. It was not the sound of her voice, the problem was I sounded like her. Like twins. I wanted a voice of my own. Sometimes I hate my voice. I can barely listen to myself when I’m at my worse.

It’s not that unbearable when it comes to seeing myself on video. I was on TV once and I wasn’t as horrified as when I see myself on photos. That’s even worse. That’s a reason I don’t post selfies and photos where you can see me. I prefer being behind the camera. I’m just not that photogenic. When I see myself in photos as an adult, the voice in my head says, ugly. It was different when I was a kid. I was cute then. I don’t know what happened. Adding a photo of myself to a CV terrifies me. I avoid every single photo of me as much as I can. I rather let people see me in real life than in photos or videos.

Boy bands and not so screaming fans

Mia3 Comments

Ahh, teenage years. Those were the days. Seeing teens today and their taste in music, I was glad I was a teen in the 90’s. None of the teen idols of today are my taste. I can’t even imagine what they see in them.

First love of a teen age crush was the American boy band ‘New kids a block‘ Especially Jordan Knight. I had my first sexual feelings. There were no internet where you could search for news. There were only teen magazines or MTV. I think they performed in Finland once but my mother didn’t let me go. I bought a lot of merchandise like badges and a calendar. I still have some of them dusting somewhere. I had posters on the wall that I got from magazines and of course cassettes on the music. Thinking about it now, I don’t know what I saw in them. There’s only a few songs I’m able to listen to. Actually I’m a bit embarrassed for liking them. They did some kind of comeback later but I haven’t paid much attention.

Then in 1992 I discovered the band ‘Take That‘ The guys are from Manchester, England. For you American’s, that’s the band Robbie Williams got started in. They’re biggest hit in the US is ‘Back for good’ They’re still very popular in the UK. I loved the band since I saw their music videos on TV. It was the interviews that made me like them even more. I loved their interviews. They’re the funniest band I know. I taped everything I saw on MTV or any other channel. I bought every album and learned the songs by heart. When Robbie left the band people were heartbroken. Some girls even thought of suicide which was a bit extreme. The band tried to continue with 4 members a while. Then in 1996 the band split altogether. That was quite a shock for me. But then 10 years later they came back.

Thanks to the internet I can listen to them online and they’re also on social media. They’re only 3 members now but they’re still going strong. I saw their concert in the movie theater last year and they’re still great. I wish I could see them live for real. But that’s kind a far-fetched dream. I was never one of those hysterical fans. I don’t know why some act like that. In a way I still live my teenage years but now it’s more mature. They’ve also grown up and fans have matured with them. Now it’s much nicer to see them perform on stage without those terrible screaming fans. I think I’ll always be some kind of fan of the band. They were a big part of my teen life and I’ll never forget that.

(FYI to The Daily Post, I still go “ga-ga” for Duran Duran 😉 So it’s not just a teen idol thing.)