Category: Writing challenges

Contains of both Daily Writing Prompts and RagTag Daily Prompts.

In his deep blue swimming pool

MiaLeave a comment
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Post title “I Believe/All I Need to Know” by Duran Duran

I have all these thoughts that simmer in my mind about what I want to do in life. It’s a deep blue pool but I don’t seem to find a lifebelt to save me from drowning. When I do get an idea out there, it seems to disappear into outer space with the rest of them. It’s difficult to stay positive when life gives you sour grapes. I keep searching for something but I don’t know what it really is. I used to have doubts about this blog too. I didn’t think it would get this far but I didn’t give up. People have found it even if it did take about 4 years or so. At least it feels that long. I wish I could be as patient as I have been with blogging. It feels like my life is getting shorter and I don’t have time to do anything before I leave this earth. But it’s not the end. I still have at least 30 years left of working years.

My life hasn’t been the way I expected it to be. I thought I would have a career by now but it’s not even close. I have no special goals and I have no ambition. People at a young age know what they want to do and they get to a position where they get experience. There’s a lot of younger people than myself who works in web design and they’ve come much further because they started when they were in their 20’s. I’m not even sure now if I really want to be a web designer. It felt like a good idea earlier in the year but now my uncertainty has come back. Maybe I’m just afraid to start anything. Now I don’t have a teacher to help me. Everything seems easy in my head but when the time comes to do something, I back off. I wrote about the life after web design education in my other blog so I don’t want to repeat things.

You might think only ordinary people have problems getting started but it can happen to anyone. Even the most obvious ones. For example, you would think someone like Tom Hiddleston would have got movie roles easily but it isn’t so. They say he wasn’t made for the big screen and that he wouldn’t get roles in blockbuster movies. Or something like that. If he had given up a movie career, it would have been a great loss for all of us who like him. No one has said to me I can’t do it but I can imagine how it would feel like. When I hear stories like that, it gives me motivation to not give up. If I only had the courage to do something instead of complaining about how difficult things are. Maybe they’re not at all but my subconscious is holding me back. I got through difficult times before and I conquered them all. What I plan to do next shouldn’t be impossible. It might simmer but not boiling over. I need to stay grounded and better things will follow.

I don’t see dead people

Mia2 Comments

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This is not a Halloween post. I don’t like Halloween. You must be ghoulish if you do. Finland doesn’t have Halloween. We got All Saint’s Day. We remember the loved ones who have passed away. We don’t do trick or treating. That has nothing to do with death. It’s not about scaring people either. Death shouldn’t be scary. What should be scary is seeing real dead people. I can’t look at dead bodies.

When my mother’s mother died, there was a photo of her dead body. I just couldn’t look at it. I found it creepy. When my mother died, I didn’t want to see her body. I didn’t want to remember her like that. Seeing your loved ones dead corpse is different from seeing one on the news. I rather not look at those either but I don’t freak out. Dead bodies on movies and in TV shows doesn’t bother me that much since I know it’s all fake. I still don’t watch anything with zombies or other unnatural things. It’s all make-up but it’s really impressively done. It’s too disgusting for my taste. I still can’t watch the whole “Thriller’ music video by Michael Jackson. I always look away when that zombie part comes.

I don’t see dead people and if I did, I would totally freak out. Apparently, there are people who actually can. I do believe there are ghosts but they’re not evil like you see in some movies. They don’t want to scare you. It would be nice if you could come back as a ghost and scare the people who have done you wrong. When I die I hope I can become one so I can haunt people for fun. Sometimes it feels like someone is watching over me since I haven’t been a terrible accident. It’s not a ghost, it’s more like a guardian angel. When I was younger I thought it could be my sister from beyond. Now it could be anyone. I think there is some kind of higher power that looks over us. It can be a ghost or a guardian angel. But like life is, you live and you die. Nothing lasts forever on earth but after death, it will.

Tallenna

Tallenna

Tallenna