Tag: creative

My path to becoming a graphic designer, or not

Mia2 Comments
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My work in 36 Days of Type on Instagram

I have recently taken part in a few challenges on Behance and Instagram, so I haven’t had the time to blog. The first one mentioned is an Adobe Illustrator challenge. The other is a typography challenge which is once a year and for 36 days. There is a letter (and number later on) every day. You can use any tool you like and any way you want. If anyone is interested, you can see my work over here. There is a lot of great work other people have done. You can use the tag #36daysoftype on Instagram. The one of Behance about Illustrator has been a lot of fun, and I’ve learned new things. It ended last Friday, but the videos are still there. I also tried the Photoshop one, but I didn’t have time to do that too. There is also a chat on Discord where you can get feedback. That’s very important because graphic design is a learning process. You are never ready. Not only graphic design but also other things in life.

It feels like I’m always late. It took me years to find what I was looking for. I’ve tried different occupations, but I have never found something I felt passionate about. I wanted to do something different. Money hasn’t been a motive for me. I rather do something that makes me feel good. I want enough money so I can afford to live. I don’t believe in that having a job that pays you well. I will rather be without a job than be in a job I don’t like. During those years where I thought about what I want to do for a living, most people already found their things. I feel like I’m only starting out even if I’ve done things for years. I don’t know what my working title is. I have never had a graphic design job where I get paid, so I don’t know if I can call myself a graphic designer. I have only had clients in web design, but that was part of the education. Having a portfolio is an important thing in creativity. Looking at other people’s portfolios, it feels like mine is plain. I don’t have much to show, only school work. If I started with graphic design earlier, I would have something to show. You can’t go back in time. It’s not too late to get something done. You only need enough confidence in yourself. You shouldn’t compare yourself to others, but it isn’t easy. You still feel you’re not up for it. It doesn’t help either when you don’t get hired anywhere. Not even an internship.

On Discord, there is a chat about creative careers where you can post your Behance portfolio. Then you can also get feedback. There are a lot of great work people have done, and then there is me. It’s a bit of an embarrassment because mine isn’t that great. I don’t even dare to introduce myself because I don’t feel like a graphic designer. Even if the first time I studied graphic design in 2009. But I wasn’t doing any of it after 2011 when it ended. The same goes with web design, but I don’t want to do that after all. Another thing is what kind of projects would I do. It seems that a lot of people have branding and visual identities. Trying to be different from other designers is difficult. My confidence in becoming one myself is soon gonna break into pieces like glass. I’m running out of options. I probably will never get a job. I hardly get any follows on social media, so getting those in the professional won’t be easy. I don’t think I will get “discovered” on Behance or any other portfolio places. My path to becoming a graphic designer started too late, and it’s only in my head that someone would hire me for my work. I shouldn’t give up, though. We all go through different paths, and there is no right or wrong way to become something you want to be.

Your consult is an insult

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Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

I don’t know how many times I’ve been to these job search courses. They’ve been quite useless. *But at least I have something to do. Like I don’t have anything else in my jobless life*. Quite frankly, their consulting is insulting. You don’t get a job; they do. They give you advice on what to do to find a job, but that doesn’t work. You must be someone special to get attention. If you don’t have an impressive resume, you don’t even get a chance. I’ve also been to a career coaching course, but I found the web design education through that one. I haven’t had much use to that school, though. Real-life has been totally different. No one wants to hire someone who hasn’t got work experience. This whole “go to a job search and doors will open” is full of it. Sound bitter? I bet I am, but some people have been to courses like that, and all they did were playing some kids games. I have got at least something out of it. I know what kind of job I want to do.

I still haven’t got a job despite that. I just don’t have anything to offer. I don’t have any marketing value, or whatever you call it. I’m a ‘boring’ person. I don’t know how to brand myself. I also lack job experience. That’s probably one of the reasons. The second is job interviews. Trying to teach me to be better at it doesn’t work. They never go as I’ve planned it. I always forget what to say to the answers to the questions. No matter how I prepare, they just don’t work. In job search tips, people forget that you need to have something on your resume. You can’t just make it pretty if you have nothing to show for it. I also hate writing cover letters. I never know what to put in them. Finnish is also not my strongest language either. Then again, I don’t know what to write them in any language. Finding a job in a creative business is even harder. There you need to have some kind of skill. You also need a few years of experience. I’ve been to job fairs, but there is never any creative businesses there.

There are many different ways to search for a job. The most overrated platform there is, and that’s LinkedIn. I don’t know for who it’s meant for. ‘Look at me’ – types, ‘Look at my company’ -types or for who? It’s not for ordinary job seekers, that’s for sure. There are consults about how to get ‘noticed’ on LinkedIn too. Personally, I find it useless, and when I go there, I only want to give it the finger. I’ve decided I will only keep it for my own good—a reminder to myself what I have done so far. For job search, it’s only crap.

I just don’t fit anywhere. I can’t find a place where I have the same values, or I’m just too introverted. You have to be outgoing and this and that. I’m too old to get a job I have no education for. I wouldn’t get one of those anyway. I want a job I know something about. I know I’ve studied the “wrong” occupation, and I can blame myself for that (I’m not really). But I rather am unemployed than be in a job I hate. At least I can do what I want. Besides, of this covid still being around, I want to stay away from unnecessary social events. I have so many other things to think about, so I don’t have time to stress about my job search right now. I want to concentrate on driving school first.

*Sarcasm

When the flow of inspiration strikes

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fingers holding a pencil
Made in Canva

Being a creative person has it’s good and bad sides. Bad is when you have no inspiration and no motivation. The best thing about it is when the flow of inspiration strikes. Those are the best days. Ideas come flooding in your head and you spend hours doing what you love. It can be writing or anything artistic. People who have these flows coming out only truly know how it feels. Other can probably imagine but they don’t really know how it is. You can’t just tell a person to create something in a minute. It takes longer than that. If you want things to be done properly you should have time to do it. Nothing good comes out of things when they are rushed. You can’t force out your creativity. Sometimes you have to wait for the flow and that’s something an ‘average’ person can’t handle.

Everyone is good at something and for me, writing is my passion. I don’t claim I’m the best because I’m not an author. I just write because I love it and I do it for fun. I especially love writing fiction. I have always had a good imagination. Writing stories was one of my favourite things in school. I always got good grades from the teachers. I got my inspirations from music, movies and daily things. It doesn’t really matter where. I can get an idea of anything. Even from strangers so people better beware because they can end up in one of my stories. OK, not really but almost. Fiction is made up and not a fact of real life. Even though sometimes when you think something won’t be real it actually does happen. I’ve been amazed by some of the characters I wrote about actually do exist in real life. It’s more about human behaviour than a real person. I’m no Agatha Christie so I don’t write crime stories like murder. Even though some of my characters do break the law.

Sometimes when I write a story I get writer’s block in the middle of a story but I get an idea what will happen after the unfinished chapter. That’s what has happened to ‘Teach me manners‘ It’s stuck now because I have written things what happens after the next episode. I can’t post it because the next one is incomplete. This is where the flow of inspiration ends. To create something I need the right moment to go on. If I don’t have the right feeling I struggle to get anything done. It’s not only about writing but it’s also photography. If I don’t have the right moment I don’t feel like doing it. That’s what I realised I can’t be a pro photographer. I don’t have the right passion. I also realised I wanted to do more than just photography. When I do get the flow going, I keep it running. Those are the best times. Having a break from one creativity thing and do the other is refreshing. It’s like taking a holiday and then come back with a lot of new ideas.

I go with the flow when I create something. It’s the same with this blog. I write when I have something to write about. That’s why I don’t want to be paid to blog. When you have it as a hobby there is no pressure to write. If you don’t feel like writing you don’t. You get to do other things and that is freedom to be creative when you feel it. In a way, the flow of inspiration is my hobby and when it strikes I’m glad I’m the creative one.