I am what I am and don’t try to change me

fingerprint identityEveryone has an identity. We’re all one of a kind. There is no one like us. Some people want to change you but everyone should respect other people the way they are. You don’t have to like a person but you shouldn’t tell them how they should live. You can’t change the way you are and no one should tell you what to be. Negative people shouldn’t be around you. They only bring you down. You can change a person way of thinking by giving them guidance. It’s up to the person to take it or not. There is a lot of issues in the world and only awareness can change attitudes. No one is perfect. Everyone has flaws and we should all accept them. We can’t all like the same things or wear the same outfits. If there wouldn’t be different personalities, what a boring place this would be.

I’ve been taught to respect different kinds of people. Since I was a child, I become familiar with disabled people. I’ve even been friends with a few. Others might look at them strangely or have been afraid to approach them. But they’re like everybody else. They have own thoughts and they are smart. They just happened to be disabled. It’s not their fault they’re born that way. The same goes with people who have different sexualities or a different skin colour. They are people like everyone else. Yet, some people see differences as a bad thing. You can’t change something that people are born with. No one can stop being what they are. Attitudes can be changed towards other people.

Bullies usually bully someone who weaker than them. Someone who is different. Kids can be really cruel when it comes to differences. If parents don’t teach kids how to behave at home, they can’t know how to be with other people. If the parents have the same attitude toward people who are different then kids are gonna act the same way. As long as adults allow bullying, it’s gonna continue. Being bullied doesn’t build character and bullying doesn’t belong to childhood. It makes a person feel worthless and it will affect their whole life. Bullying doesn’t need to be physical. Words hurt even more. Bullies are the one with the problems. When they can’t get attention at home, they find it somewhere else. Kids are not the only one who bullies. Also in the working world but it’s not talked about as much as kids. Which is a shame since adults can be even worse. If kids continue bullying as adults, things have gone too far.

I wasn’t physically bullied but I haven’t really completely got without it. They were too cowardly to say anything to my face. It was alienating and whispering. It did affect me in a way that I didn’t trust people as much as before. But it didn’t make me think of myself as a failure. I became stronger mentally. I wouldn’t let these experiences spoil my confidence. When I read about bullying, it makes my blood boil. No one should go through this. I’m glad my childhood and youth are not now. On the internet, it’s so easy to stay behind a username and write nonsense to a person. I can’t even imagine how it is to be bullied online. There you can’t defend yourself. People don’t realise that you’re also a bully if you let it happen. The bystanders who are too afraid to tell the bullies to stop. My teacher knew there was something going on but she didn’t do anything about it. I was lucky I didn’t need to be in the class for many years. Some are bullied for years. The longer it happens, the more difficult it gets to get over it.

I am what I am and don’t try to change me. I’m totally fine the way I am. I’m never doing things what others tell me to do. I have a mind of my own. A few have tried to change me but they have failed. I’m not here to please people. I only care about those who deserve it. Life is too short to think about shallow things. It’s what on the inside that counts. If you take my identity away, I’m like everyone else. I dare to be different and so should many others.

Tallenna

Two identities in one

identityI am a Gemini, there for I have 2 identities. One is the identity at home, the other is the one I show people. In a way I do have 3 but the 3rd is something no one knows about. Sounds like I have an identity crisis 😀 Or a multi personality disorder or hiding from the law but that’s not it. I know who I am and what I’m like. I’ve never had problems with my identity. I’m proud of who I am and where I come from. Problems are elsewhere.

I’ve always been careful and sometimes too much. I think it has to do with loosing someone at a very young age. Sometimes I think what kind of person I would be if my sister lived. Maybe I would have been more outgoing or maybe braver than I am now. It’s kind if unnecessary to think what could have been. You can’t change the past. My mother said once, maybe if she had done things differently I could have been less sensitive. But it wasn’t her fault. I don’t blame anyone. Not even those people who hurt me emotionally in school. It’s just the way things went and there’s nothing to do then go forward. It has taken years to realise that I am what I am and I should be proud to be different. Because that’s what my identity is.

I’ve always felt I was smarter than other people at my age. In the teenage years others smoked and drank because they thought that’s the only way to have fun. For me that was stupid. Especially smoking. I’ve never tried it because what’s the point. I won’t gain anything from that. I hated disco’s in school and I was glad I was never invited to parties. I was once but that was because of pity but I said no. It was just a ‘get drunk’ party anyway. I hate that stuff. I don’t feel I’ve missed anything. You can’t miss something you never had.

When people first meet me, they get the impression this is how I am all the time. You won’t get to see the person I am by just one meeting. That’s the reason I probably find it hard to find a job. My first impression is not the best. You get to know me step by step. Even then you really won’t know what I’m really like. Introversion is part of my identity. I chose who I open up too. It has to do with not trusting people completely. Once you get hurt by others, you’ll be careful the rest of your life. But that’s my identity. It’s nothing personal.

I’m also stubborn. You can’t force me to do things I don’t want to. I do them in my own time. If it’s really important I can do them straight away. But don’t rush me. I hate rushing things. You don’t want to see my dark side. People who doesn’t know me thinks I’m quiet and serious but at home I’m totally the opposite. I’m opinionated and swear like a sailor (almost 😀 ) But I can also be playful and childlike but that’s a side I only show people I really know.

When I look myself in a mirror I see a different person. What I feel inside and the way I look, doesn’t go together. That’s one of the reasons I don’t like mirrors. I feel confident inside but when it comes to my looks, I feel insecure. I prefer being behind the camera instead of being at the front. I don’t post photos of me online but that’s a choice. I don’t want to be like everybody else. I dare to be different. I want people to know my mind and see what I’m good at. That’s part of my identity.

Concealing my identity

TargaTeeIt’s not you, it’s me. No, this post is not about dating 😉 It’s about concealing my identity online. Some people post almost anything about themselves on the internet which takes all the mystery out of a person. If you reveal everything about yourself, there’s nothing more to tell. Photos of yourself online can also lead to problems. Anyone can use them for profit or use them for other things. Once you post photos, they stay online forever even if you delete them. I don’t want that much attention so that’s one of the reasons why I don’t post photos of myself. Besides I prefer being behind the camera.

I want to conceal some things from others. I rather reveal what I’m thinking and not even all of my thoughts sees the daylight. Some things should remain private. If I reveal my real identity, it’s to a person I know very well. The reason is not that I want to be something I’m not or that I have secrets. It’s more about me being a private person. Internet is a big place and a lot people want to take advantage of you. If people really knew what goes in my head in certain things, they probably wouldn’t understand.

You see people tweeting or in Facebook about their lives but I’m not that kind of person. I even feel uncomfortable when people look at me so why would I post photos of me online. When people say they don’t want to join the social media because they think their identity will be revealed. I don’t understand why they complain about that. You don’t have to put anything about yourself. You have a choice what to write about. Dare to be different. Don’t be those selfie posters. You don’t have to. I’ve gone without it so far and that hasn’t done me any harm. Of course it’s a different matter if you don’t really need to join. But in today’s society using social media is an advantage. Especially in getting a job. Via social media you also get information about the world quicker. If I didn’t use it, I would never had known there are people out there who really can relate to me and I can relate to them. Since I don’t travel that much, I’ve also “met” other nationalities through it.

I might not reveal details about me and my life that much but I still get by. Writing about experiences I’ve had and thoughts about things has reached to other people. That’s what blogging is all about. I don’t need to brag around the internet. Concealing your identity is not a bad thing. It’s a choice which anyone can do if they only want to. If you want to be like everybody else that’s alright too. But again, dare to be different. That’s what makes life interesting.