Tag: Life

An abandon plan opens a new one

Mia1 Comment
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Made in Canva. Image by Pexels from Pixabay

When you’re young you think you need to make final decisions about your future and stick with it. But in life, you never know. Sometimes you have to abandon a plan and start all over. It’s fine to change your mind. I’ve started a lot of things over again. If it’s about choosing an occupation or even starting a blog. A lot of people made bucket lists and if they don’t achieve them they feel they have failed. Life is not gonna be over. You can achieve them at any age. You don’t need to do everything before you’re 20 or 30. Not even in your life. Some things are impossible to achieve anyway. For example, everyone won’t invent something that still doesn’t exist. Your goals should be little things.

An abandon plan opens a new one and it can be something much better. I have many times abandoned my fanfictions and starting a new one. So I have quite a lot of unfinished stories I’ve posted online. I get new ideas and then I forget the old ones. It’s either boredom of the stories or my interests have changed. It can also be because I feel people aren’t reading them anymore. I don’t know if the new ideas are better though. I post them on AO3 (Archive of our own) and some older stories still get kudos even if I finished them ages ago. I use to post them on my fanfiction blog here on WordPress but it’s a bit difficult because my stories are quite long. I just can’t seem to write short stories. I plan it to be short but then when I get ideas, they keep on coming.

Before I started this blog I had a few but they didn’t pay off. You know what they say (or William Edward Hickson said), if you don’t first succeed, try try and again. So I did and here I am, still. I also have two on Tumblr but the whole place has gone downhill. I can’t find anything to post there. I had to start the main blog all over again so the old stuff I had there is gone. So no more pics of Tom Hiddleston. Not that I reblogged that very often. Now nothing interesting is coming on the Explore. It’s a place where you can find what is trending and recommendations for you. Since all the old things are gone on my blog the rest is gone too. I reblogged quite a lot but now there’s only boring stuff. I don’t bother searching for things to post myself either. Besides, Tumblr has always been a place for weird stuff. It was fun when I started to use it but now I’m quite bored with it. At least they banned pornographic stuff there. I hated it when people with half-naked photos of themselves started to follow my blog. I’m no prude but my blog wasn’t for people like that. The only thing I post there is this blog post but it’s probably going to deaf ears over there.

I wish I could make easy decisions with other things like I do with writing. I shouldn’t be worried about failing but I still do. With writing it doesn’t matter if I fail because it’s just a hobby but if I fail in life decisions things can go worse. Running out of money or end up on the street. That’s quite a radical example but it could happen. I think that’s one of the reasons why I keep thinking about becoming an entrepreneur or not. It’s easy to think about things in your head but the reality is much harder. I go back and forth with my thoughts but I can’t make a decision. As an unemployed, it’s not easy to start something because if you do, you get in trouble with the job centre. And other things could happen which I won’t get into. Some impatient person would probably be fed up with my indecisiveness already. No one should be hurried with deciding things. You should do them in your own time. Plans take time to fulfil. I wish I would have thought like this when I was younger. It would have saved a lot of time and less stress. Even though I don’t regret my past I wish I could have abandoned some things a bit faster than I did. What done is done.

To skedaddle or not, that is the question

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To skedaddle or not, that is the question. It’s so easy to escape from things and places so you don’t have to face them. You stop thinking about it or you think you do it some other time. When I was younger I wanted to skedaddle from things that didn’t interest me. Or maybe it did interest me but I was too shy to approach the matter. I had mild anxiety and the only thought I had was to escape from the situation. One of those was about taking a blood test. Once I didn’t go even if the doctor gave me a referral to one. I still don’t like needles which is the reason why I wouldn’t donate blood. Hospitals are also places I want to skedaddle from. I can visit them but being a patient is something else. You want to skedaddle from things that give you anxiety or if you have had bad experiences. For me it’s hospitals. I’ve visited them so often when I was a child (my big sister was sick) so I’ve had enough of them. Luckily I’ve only been as a patient twice and those were awful experiences.

Giving presentations is also something I didn’t want to do. I hated those times in school when I had to stand in front of a class that I didn’t even like. I felt they were mocking me silently and it felt uncomfortable being stared at. I just wanted to skedaddle but somehow I got through with the presentation. In later years, I discovered if the audience was familiar and they were actually nice people, then giving a presentation wasn’t that bad. I still wouldn’t give speeches in front of strangers though. Unless it’s people I know somehow and they’re not that many.  Presentations are much better than group work. I rather do that. Of course, it depends what kind of group work it is and with who. I think you gain more confidence in giving presentations if you do it often. Practice makes you better.

In life, there are things that make you want to skedaddle because you feel insecure. Especially young people who haven’t had enough experiences can feel anxiety to certain things. I’ve been there and I did leave a place without even telling anyone about it. That’s something I wouldn’t do today. Even if I sometimes have the feeling I want to skedaddle, I don’t. I face my insecurity and meet what is coming at me. If there are problems ahead you should face them as an adult. Only kids run away from conflicts or things they feel uncomfortable about. I wouldn’t want to go back to the person I was when I was younger. The feeling about wanting to skedaddle from places or situations is not a nice one. Staying and facing them is a better option because, in the end, things can’t be as bad as you thought.