Month: March 2018

So familiar but yet so foreign

MiaLeave a comment

foreign

They say you’re never ready, there’s always something new to learn. Something can be so familiar but yet so foreign.

I love learning new things. If they stay in my head is a different matter. I don’t know how many times I tried to learn something but then forgot all about it later. Especially in learning languages. Being bilingual is a bit confusing sometimes. Some words I know what they are in Finnish but then when I try to remember what they are in Swedish, I have to look it up. Or then it’s the other way around. If that wasn’t enough, the same occurs with English. But then I go to an online translator to find the word. That happens quite a lot when I write this blog. If I don’t find the word I’m looking for I usually write things differently or skip it altogether.

Some things you learn by doing them over and over again. But my problem with that is keeping the motivation up. It’s an everyday struggle but I work on it. I don’t think I ever get good at anything since I like a lot of different things. It’s the same with taste in music or movie genres. I like changes. I do things if it feels right at that moment. I never seem to learn by reading. Maybe I’m slow but I rather listen to someone talking about a subject or showing me how to do things. I lose interest quickly if it’s something I find boring. I’m not really good at this self-taught thing. That’s the reason why I’ve gone to school to learn things.

Practice makes perfect the saying goes but I prefer practice makes you better. No one is perfect because if we were, we would all be robots. Foreign things make us familiar but familiar also makes us foreign to things. If we all knew everything at once, there would be nothing left to learn.

The invisible woman

Mia7 Comments

invisible stockholm

There is a song by Queen called ‘The invisible man‘ That’s what I feel but as a woman. I’m an invisible individual that no one seems to care about in real life. Except for my dad. I’m totally fine with that because I don’t want that much attention. But when it comes online, I want someone to notice me. Not like notice, notice. I’m not looking for fame. I just want to touch at least one person’s heart. I especially feel invisible when I post something online and no one pays attention. The Internet is a big place and everyone can’t get the same amount of attention. But yet it feels a bit depressive.

When I started blogging, it felt even worse. I did get followers in the end but the beginning wasn’t really pleasant. I didn’t know what I did wrong. Maybe my blog was too different. It doesn’t have what other blogs have. The subjects weren’t ‘sexy’ It isn’t about food or fashion. It doesn’t even help people. That’s what people look for on the internet, information that helps them. I’m the kind of person who searches for answers and not giving them. I don’t have enough of patience to teach people. Even helping my dad with the computer is a pain. If it was a stranger, I would probably get irritated and yell at them to fix their own problem. As the years of blogging has gone by I’ve told myself, so what if I’m invisible, I write anyway. Someone will always notice even if they don’t show it. Maybe I have helped someone but I don’t know it. If you’re a new blogger, don’t worry if you don’t get followers after your first post. If you wait long enough and keep writing, they will come. Some bloggers just get there faster than others.

I wish I could believe in my own advice. I think to myself I’m probably just a boring person that no one takes an interest in. If it’s about writing (blogging, fan fiction) or posting on social media. It’s like talking to a wall. If something good or bad happens in my life and I post it online, I get no reaction. It’s nobodies fault really, it’s just my paranoia talking. Sometimes my pessimism gets a hold on me. I always think what could go wrong instead of taking a chance. It shouldn’t matter if not a lot of people take notice. But that’s the whole point of being online. If you can’t get attention from others, you might just be invisible. I don’t completely trust my online presense when it comes to marketing my skills. It seems everything I do, goes down the drain. It feels like I have no talent and my destiny is to be ignored the rest of my life. If only I could get paid to be invisible and I didn’t need to do anything. Maybe going around poking people and they would wonder what it was all about.

So that this post wouldn’t sound so depressing, this video will make you feel a lot better.