Nothing specific

snickers bar

Sometimes there’s nothing specific I want to blog about. I don’t know what you think about free writing and do you actually like reading something that doesn’t make any special sense. Anyway, this is free writing and I write what comes to mind. I don’t have specific time. I write as much ideas comes flying in. Randomly we got snow for once. It’s been a strange winter here in the South of Finland. Usually we got more snow but now it’s not the same anymore. I blame climate change. People who doesn’t like snow are probably happy about that. But those people don’t care about the future. They spend natures resources without thinking about the consequences. Or maybe they think like Trump, there’s no such thing as climate change. It must be much better to live in denial than face the facts. But enough about that.

The point in free writing is to write whatever comes to mind. But that’s not always the case. You can’t just write anything. You don’t want to hurt people’s feelings on purpose. I can’t do that. I care about other people’s feelings. My mother taught me that. She taught me a lot of things which is the reason I am what I am. But also because my life hasn’t been perfect. No fairy tales here. It’s been more a struggle than happy moments. I have never had anything special. I don’t do things, I dream. I rather dream then go through difficult relationships or whatever. That’s the reason I want things I can’t have. I rather run than stick around. Emotionally that is. I’m not actually running. I just sit here writing this post. The radio is on and Elton John is on. Someone is cleaning the snow outside. Or whatever it’s in English. In this case I don’t have time to look it up. This is the worse thing about free writing in a foreign language. There are words you don’t know what they are in English. I’m babbling.

I should go to the grocery store. I’m leaving tomorrow to the town I’m studying in. It really sucks when they have change the bus schedule on Monday. No more early mornings. No I have to go to the dorm on a bloody Sunday. My weekends are gonna be really short. I would rather wait until Monday to leave but what can you do. These are times I wish I had a driver’s license because these public transport things are a pain. They have wrapped us around their little finger. These are things that are out of your control and you just have to accept that. The town I’m going to is a small place and it’s in the middle of nowhere. At least you can walk to the center. Luckily this education is ending in May but still a long way to go.

Where is this blog going to? It’s not going anywhere? It’s a blog. Not funny. I can’t write funny things. People see me as a serious person. I don’t crack jokes. I understand humour but I’m not funny. Some says women are not suppose to be funny. But that’s where they are wrong. Ellen (you know who) for example is really funny. She’s one of my heros but so is a lot of women. Strong women who don’t give a damn about what other’s think of them. My all time favorite is Madonna. She’s still cool. I follow her on Facebook and she was voted, the woman of the year. She does a lot of good things. Especially for kids. She was one of the first woman who showed the pop world that no matter what race or sexuality you are, you have the right to be here. Other woman I admire is Pink. I follow her a Twitter. She’s got attitude and tell the haters where to get off. Her family is so precious too. The world needs strong women like that. There’s enough of airheads already who can’t do anything for this world. They just shake their asses on hip hop videos or date famous people. And no I’m not talking about Taylor Swift. I don’t listen to her music but I think she’s misunderstood. She’s no airhead. At least that’s what she seems like. She does give money to charity and cares about others. But enough about her.

This free writing is kind of fun but times is out. This post could get very long if I continue. I try to make blog posts short because that’s what I like to read. I never have patience enough to read something off a screen. Ouch my eyes. If I read books I would rather read from a real one and not a screen. There was a lot of subjects in this post. I hope someone at least bother to read to the end. I say goodbye for now so

principal skinner saying goodbye

 

 

Tallenna

Out of sight, out of mind

lee pace written in snowOut of sight, out of mind

Get rid of temptation they say

Out of sight, out of mind

But every time I think I’m over it, you pull me back in

You got a hold on me and you don’t even know it

When I see someone else I think why can’t they be like you

No one’s perfect but you’re perfection

You’re more than just good looks and a great talent

The first time I saw you I was impressed , all you had to do was show up

If I was in love it would be with you

Out of sight, out of mind doesn’t help but I don’t really want to

You’re my inspiration and that’s a fact

Tallenna

Tallenna

Tallenna

Tallenna

Tallenna

Tallenna

Crossing the bridge

RailwayBridge
The Railway Bridge, Riga, Latvia

There’s a saying “crossing the bridge when we get there” which means you handle a problem when you get there if there will be any. But I always think about what could go wrong before it happens. I think what if I do something wrong or say something wrong. Before I say anything to someone I think before I speak and sometimes I leave it at that. I never do anything spontaneous. I couldn’t organise an event for someone else. My plans usually goes wrong so I stopped planning. I live the day as they come. I couldn’t cross a line in any circumstances. I don’t like hurting people’s feelings so I hold my tongue with my thoughts. I feel guilty if I hurt someone I know. When I was angry at my parents I always regretted it later.

I try to do things even if I think of the worse. They usually end up alright and wonder why I was worried in the first place. Some things I do worry when I get there. For example when I apply to schools I just cross my fingers and hope for the best. I’ve been lucky to have got in to school’s I applied to. When you’re young it’s very important to get an education or you fall through the cracks. There’s a lot of youngsters who become outcasts because they don’t get that stability from a young age. If I hadn’t got anything after I left primary school, who knows where I would be now. I just wish I could get a job as easily as becoming a student. When I graduate from this education I’m on now this spring, I don’t know what I’ll do next. But I’m crossing the bridge when I get there. That’s the only time I do that. Other times I worry too much.

Sometimes I don’t even bother my mind with how things will go. Blogging is one of them. I don’t worry about what people might think of me. It’s easier to write about yourself and your thoughts through a blog. People still won’t get to know me completely. There are things I keep to myself. You might know what I’m about but no one won’t get to know me. That goes for anyone. You know who you are and that’s what important. On the internet you can’t tell everything about yourself. You should really worry what you put online because there’s a lot of people who tries to take advantage of you. “Crossing the bridge when you get there” doesn’t apply here. Once you put things online, it stays there and it’s too late to take it back. Every photo of yourself is out there for anyone to use. It’s worrying to see people posting selfies of themselves and photos of where they live. It can be a dangerous game. You think there’s no harm of showing yourself. You can always take it offline but it’s already out there. That’s one of the reasons why I don’t post photos of myself more than I have. No one knows where it will end up. I don’t want that much attention. Especially posting photos of your children can lead to anything bad. I don’t even want to think where those photos will end up. People are so careless and they should really think the worse first before posting anything online.

Like in an American police series ‘Hills street blues’ once said, “Let’s be careful out there”