I’m not a shoe

friends quote
Made in Canva

The society expects you to achieve certain things at a certain age. You should have kids at 25, a career and so on. But what if you don’t want to have any of those things. Are you a bad person if you don’t? Maybe in some cultures, it is and your relatives do anything to find you a partner. All women should have the right to choose what kind of life they want to live. I’m not a shoe and I don’t want to be one either. If you want to be a shoe, it’s your choice. Some of us want to fight against that. Unfortunately, not everyone is lucky to be born in a country where women have a choice.

I’ve always been someone who wants to be different. Even though at 17 I thought about getting married and have kids before 25 but I lived in a fantasy land then. Now I’m glad I didn’t choose that life for different reasons. Many people study to a occupation and stick to it for the rest of their lives without studying anything else after that. I have had the right to study new things. It does have its downsides but that’s better than be stuck in a rut. You see people complaining about their job without realising there are people who don’t have a job. They should appreciate they have a place where they can go and earn money. Changing your career path is not too late. You don’t have to stay at a job you don’t like. Don’t be that shoe everyone expects you to be. You shouldn’t waste your life on something that you’re not passionate about. You wouldn’t want to wear a shoe that doesn’t fit all your life, would you? If it’s doesn’t fit, get a new one. It’s the same with career choices. If you don’t like your job, educate yourself to something else. Even people with a family have changed careers. Of course, it’s easier when you don’t have one but it’s not impossible either.

Happiness doesn’t mean the same to everyone. For some, it’s having that family with kids. For me, it’s having the freedom to do what I want. I can stay up as late as I want. I don’t need to ask permission from another person to go to places. I can also have crushes without having to hurt someone else’s feelings. It’s much more tempting to be alone than all the drama that people cause. I will never understand the urge people have is to find someone. What’s so bad of being alone anyway? Maybe it’s a thing in the American culture that has spread across the world. You see a lot of these finding the right person in American movies and television shows. If you’ve watched Friends, Chandler Bing says in an episode, “What if I’ll never find someone?” or “What if I die alone?” I would say, what’s the big deal? Be happy you’re single and stop whining, I think when I see it. Some of us aren’t meant to find anyone because we can be happy without relationships. If someone’s purpose in life is to get married and have kids, then so be it but don’t expect everyone else to do the same. Maybe I would change my tune if I found someone worth my time but that will never happen (they are probably taken already anyway) Nah, I don’t need a man to make me feel complete. I do much better on my own. I’m not a shoe because I can also be a purse or a hat like Rachel Green says in an episode of Friends. I can be anything I want and I don’t need anyone’s approval. So be anything you want because you have the right to do so. Everyone doesn’t need to follow the same script of life and other people should respect that.

4 thoughts on “I’m not a shoe

  1. If you’ve understood that you’re free to choose whatever suits you, that’s already a big step ahead in life. I must say though that I sense a little bit of bitterness in your writing, you don’t feel like you’re totally fine with being single, or not having a career. But I might be wrong as well. The way I see is, if you’re fine with your life choices, why write such a post ? Who are you trying to convince ? What made you write about that ? Please do not get me wrong or something, just sharing my feeling.

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