Ten years of nothing

blurry and dark nothing
Made in Canva

I don’t memorise years so I don’t know what happened when. All I know is that in 10 years I haven’t accomplished nothing to brag about. When others have had career moves, families and other things they’re proud of, I’ve just hung on. But I’ve learned to enjoy the small things because big things only disappoint. If I went to a school reunion I would feel like a failure because I haven’t done anything. I wouldn’t even go. Some people think they need to do something special so they can call them living life. I have never needed to go to some other place to find myself. Whatever finding yourself means. Anyway, the point with this post is going down the memory lane. I got this idea from a post on Instagram.

I studied graphic design in a 2-year education. This was the 2nd year. That’s all of that year.

I graduated from the graphic design education. This was the last year we went to Lapland to ski. I didn’t know it would be the last.

My mother was diagnosed with cancer which was a big chocker. She got treatment and went through operations. There were still hope she would win the decease. The year was a lot of that so I don’t remember anything else. Oh, besides I got an internship in a local newspaper for two weeks as a photographer. Even if my mother was sick she was still concerned about me finding a job.

This year was the most difficult time for me and my family. Mother told us her cancer couldn’t be cured. The doctor had done everything but nothing helped. Soon she got worse and maybe two weeks (or a week) at the hospice she was gone. That Christmas was the worse.

This year I started this blog. I did write occasionally in 2013 but 2014 was the year I really started it. I also studied photography at Helsinki Design School.

I finished photography education. I realised I didn’t want to do photography like a pro after all so it was time to think about something else once again.

I found a web design education that lasted a year. I applied and got in. I wrote a blog about my education which is called ‘My Web Design Haven’. I don’t write it anymore but here it is. The education included on-the-job learning where you should find clients by yourself. Luckily I found at least one. That was hard because coding is not my favourite thing but luckily the client was very understanding. I got good feedback from the client as well.

There was another on the job learning and this time we had to have at least 3 clients. I found them but only two of them was serious.  This was the time I really started to think about entrepreneurship. I really liked the thought of not having to go anywhere and I could choose my own time. To pass the education we had to have a presentation of our client work in front of 3 valuators. It was really nerve-wracking. In the end, I passed and graduated. I only had one job interview but that’s something I don’t want to remember. I went to my first ever live concert that summer and that was Robbie Williams. I wasn’t sure I would go but I’m glad I did.

At the beginning of that year, I got accepted to a course about entrepreneurship. It was mostly done online but we had some meetings too. The hardest part was writing a business plan. After that course, I decided to apply to Helsinki Design School again. This time in graphic design. I applied to it twice and the 2nd time I got in. My plan was to add graphic design to my services if I would become an entrepreneur.


I was on a plane for the first time in my life. I and dad went to the Canarian Islands. I got through the graphic design education. This is where I began to rethink about entrepreneurship and I’m still doubting. I applied for a job in something else but the interview was just that and nothing else. I hate it when I have to assume I didn’t get the job. Again they didn’t give me an answer. But I didn’t want the job anyway.

Then there’s this year. I’m getting a new laptop because my old one has Windows 7 and they won’t update that anymore. I’m changing brands as well. It’s a Mac which I’ve used before so it’s nothing new. Then there’s the concert by Elton John at the end of summer. That’s all I know so far.

So there you have it. Ten years of nothing is not entirely true. I did do things so it’s not all boring. Both happy and sad things but nothing to brag about on social media and such. Where I will be ten years later is a question I don’t want to reply to. I don’t even know what I’m doing at the weekend. No one really knows what will happen in 10 years. It’s only wishful thinking.

9 thoughts on “Ten years of nothing

  1. I think you are underselling your experience. It sounds like you are finding a lot of what you are possibly good at, but realizing you don’t want to do it is a huge step. Doing things, just to be doing them and not enjoying them is a recipe for self-destruction inevitably. I think a lot of people search for a very long time to find what fulfills and feeds their soul. Just working until you find that place is okay. Just being is okay. If you can find pleasure in the everyday choices you make along the way is a win in and of itself. Also, I’m impressed by your ability to go out and learn new skills. I am daunted by technology and I know this limits my ability to fit into the modern work world. I will try to find my own way back to steady employment in 2020. If I had to review my last decade, I might be discouraged by my lack of progress, but I keep getting up and I keep trying. That is no small thing!


  2. Young lady why do you say nothing? Have you read your blog?📃 Have you read your blog a second time? 📄Have you read your blog a third time?📑You have overlooked all the accomplishments you made. I think you should read your blog a fourth time and write down;
    a) all your schooling, 📓
    b) job searching, job interviews
    c) do you really need to brag on social media. Will it get you a job?
    d) did you ever think of combining your photography 📸with your graphic design. The combination maybe what you are looking for.
    e) be positive
    Step back and take a breather. You have gone thru a lot with your mom’s illness, so sorry for your loss.
    Take care, Hope


    1. Some experiences yes but nothing lasting. I’ve actually thought about d) and also adding web design to that. But I’m still thinking about the photography part.
      Some have found a job through social media but it’s pure luck. And I don’t want to brag there either 😀


  3. Sorry to read about your mom. As you wrote, ten years of nothing was not entirely true, you did much and gained quite a few skills. 2020 has just begun and then there is Elton John concert. Best wishes for a wonderful year.


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